2001-11-07 14:59:17 (UTC)

Life changes you...

I have a horrible tendency to always think I am right
and to put the blame on others. The funny thing is that I
honestly won't think it is my fault, unless someone points
it out to me.
Two fridays ago (10/26)I went to a show at the Hawk's
Nest with Michelle and Cara. Michelle introduced me to her
friend, Dave, who was working in the lighting booth and
whom booked the show. He was a scrawny little punk kid, but
he seemed really chill. He is one of those guys that, even
though he isn't all that attractive, there is something
very interesting about him. You can't help but stare in
wonderment. I, on the other hand, don't stare because it is
too obvious - I glance (LOL). Anyway, we stayed for the end
of the show, but we had all ready missed the first two
bands. The last one was good though, really good. After the
set, we went back up to the room for 10 minutes to ... well
I don't waste time I guess. We went back down to
the Hawk's Nest to...mingle I guess. Dave and Dobbson were
helping the band clean up. We were talking to Dave and the
singer and one of the guitarists came over and began
talking to us. The singer, Chris, was a little odd. He gave
me a big hug like I was is best friend. But I figured he
was either gay or just really excited from the night.
We spent the whole night with Dave and the band.
Michelle and Cara ditched to go to sleep, but Meredith hung
out with me and the guys. Kevin and Mike stayed at Dave's
place, in Park River, and the rest of the band stayed at a
motel 6.
I hung out with Dave and watched Sleepy Hollow. I
don't know how I ended up in his room, in his bed, watching
a DVD; but I did. I sort of regret it now, only because of
the problems we had since - but not really. I got to know
him well that night, not perfectly. We didn't sleep at all.
We talked and talked. Then, around 5 in the morning we
kissed...and kissed and kissed. That was the problem. It
wasn't that it is bad to kiss someone you barely know, well
actually it is. Because neither of us knew what that meant.
On the following thursday, we decided to just be
friends because neither of us wanted to be in a
relationship and it was moving very fast. Dave,
thoughtlessly decided to have this talk with me after we
had been fooling around. So I thought I had just been used.
After a long weekend of misunderstandings and
arguements and tears, Dave and I really talked and figured
out what was going on. We still need to talk more, but that
will come it time. You never know what might happen, we
might end up together again. But for now... friends is good
enough for me, even if it is awkward.