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2001-11-05 07:58:10 (UTC)


I've been pretty worn out lately. I'm not sure why. Even
smoking a cigarette makes me light headed sometimes. My
body isn't working with me very well. I found some marks on
my body, and I don't know what they are/were. They've
started to go away now, but they're gonna leave scars
behind. Jessica's mother told me she thought they were
shingles, and she's a nurse. Maybe that's what they were.
I feel really bad because I missed Teirsa's birthday party.
I really wanted to be there, but there was no way I could
get the day off, or even switch a shift with someone.
Krenda told me to call in sick, but I can't do that. My job
is my obligation, and I can't afford to lose it. I'm gonna
make it up to Teirsa somehow.
I still love my job, but I'm getting pretty irrated. Mark
has been promising me SOC's but he hasn't given me one. And
then one night, he said he'd watch me, but he didn't let me
know one way or another. So I'm getting confused. Maybe
they don't want me there as much as they say they do, and
maybe I'm not as valuable as an employee as they say I am.
Who knows.
Justin and I got into a fight this morning. One of our
first ones in a really, really long time. But it was over
before too long, and we're doing good again. I'm so glad
that he's with me. It's nice being able to sleep with him
again, and not be lonely at night.
My father and I are having some problems. He's mad at the
fact that Justin is living with me, and no matter how hard
I try to get back into school, he still says I'm putting
forth no effort. He's making things really hard for me, and
I'm hurting alot from the things that he says to me. He's
constantly putting me down about working at McDonald's and
he's always putting down my lifestyle. I wish he could just
pretend to be proud of me sometimes.
Well, I've got an interview to get into school tomorrow at
9, so I had better get going. I'll update later.
Love, Shelby