pepampa

What's the point!
2001-11-04 05:10:37 (UTC)

Past veiw.

Thinking of a moment earlier in the day,
When the song came on and I went somewhere else,
In a place where I miss you, A place where I remember,
When I was there, My face changed..my smile fadded,
As my smile fadded my mind was lost in this place of thought
Thinking how I have missed you weeks even days before,
Knowing there are 50 more days, still left to miss you,
Many more moments, many more tears, lie ahead of me

When I was in this place thinking of how much I missed you,
I thought well, maybe I am getting used to missing him,
That maybe me being used to it will actually make it better,
Or be the complete opposite and be the worst,
So far so good I am handling things ok....most times,
Now I thought bout it what if I do get used to missing him,
Does it mean I will always be there in my place of thought,
Or does it mean that I wont be bothered by it so much??

Who know's maybe when the song plays, I just wont hear it,
Maybe it will change completely, I wont be upset,
I wont think about missing you..cuz I'll be used to it,
Cuz it seems to long till your here, Cuz your so far away,
Maybe my smile will stay with me, But I still miss you,
Or possibly my smile will fade until I dont miss you,

There's only one way I wont miss you, Thats to be with you,
When Im in your presence, with in your reach,
I wont miss you, I wont be thinking of what we had,
I will make new thoughts, have many more memories,
For when your gone, and I'm so far away once again,

Will it be the same the next time I am missing you???
It could be harder, because I know this time will be better
After being with you again,You will be taken away once more,
Will the thought of me missing you be harder than it is now?
Or will it be different because when I see you again I know
that it's the start of our "together forever"
One thing I alway's do is think of what lies ahead,
Maybe I shouldn't..maybe I should take it as it comes,
I mean .. I should just think what I have, how I feel,
Think of why I am better person,be happy for all that I love
I should think about who I love my beautiful Matt & Hannah,
But how can I not think ahead..look to the future???
It's the future I look forward to, its you I will have in
time, not for a moment, a day or a year, but a lifetime,
Nothing short of my lifetime, will I love him, need him,

Well I still havent figured out what I should do,
Or if being used to missing you is a good or a bad thing,
I dont want my emotions to run short, I always want to miss
you, just not sure if being used to it is good, or bad???
Hmmmm It's a tough one but I'm not even sure if I am used
to it,
I know I love you soo much, and I will love you forever,
You are all that I have wanted all, that I will ever need,
One of which I hold everynight, as I tuck her to bed,
One that is too far away, and I wait to sleep beside him
again,
I have half of what I need with me now, sleeping beihind me
And the other half to complete me, will take time,
patience, strenght and work to get to....
Soon I will have all that I miss, all I look forward to,
Until that day, I will try to deal with what I feel,
And try to carry a smile thinking about all I will have,
In time I will be complete, happy throughout life...
Now I smile knowing its ok to miss you..because it just
shows how badly I love you, and need you.
There is no doubt in my mind how my love will stay strong,
How one day we will all be together..a happy little family,
Sounds so cute and maybe even cheesy, but not to me,
Not if you have felt what i have..and feel what I feel,
One that note I will end off saying I love you both,
Tonight I will kiss half of my life goodnight.....
The other half of my life I have said goodnight, without a
kiss, just my voice passd on through the phone,
*sigh* I know...soon baby right? I know....
I love my Matt and my little Hannah so much:)
I cant wait to be with you Matt!!!!!!