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2001-11-02 04:32:42 (UTC)

sex, drugs and my life

Wow, so much goes on as time passes. Today I find out that
Andrew isnt mad at me, but he didnt seem to want to talk
about being depressed either. Thats ok, I give him a
little bit of time and he will open up about it.

But omg I am so sick today. I have a cold or something,
but all I want to do is talk to Andrew and go to bed. So
thats what I am doing right now. God I love him so much.
Hes a big part of my life. So anyway I talk to him for
like half an hour, then I go to bed. These pills that I
take when Im sick put me right to sleep. Damn they could
cure an insomnia. It did it to me anyway. I hate
sleeping. Its like you sleep 1/3 of your life away. What
the hell good is that gonna do you? Sure you dream, but
how often is that dream gonna come true? If all my dreams
came true, by now i would have been ate by a bear, and I
would have been kidnaped, and my grandma would have dropped
a knife on my head. No not all good dreams, but it makes
life a little more interesting.

And what the hell is up with people doing drugs? I guess
that is one thing that really bothers me. Its not
something I like to admit, but sure I have done them, and
most of the people I know have or still do. I have been
free and clear of drugs for over a year now. (sex too, but
we will get to that later) Honestly that little plant that
you smoke isnt going to take you anywhere that you cant go
on your own. It just makes you a bit more stupid and
dilusional. And I am sorry to offend any pot smoking
dumbasses that might read this. Or maybe Im not but I
thought I could be courteous for a moment. Or alcoholics
are even worse. At least pot smokers are funny and
relaxed. While alcoholics on the other hand are very rude
and pushy, and alot of the time aggresive. Thats just too
much. Sure I have had my time of drinking. Drunk sex,
parties, more drunk sex and making out, then theres always
clean up the next day. Not so fun. expecially if you
puked all over in the bathroom and then passout in the
shower. Just not the highlight of my life. Of course
thats back when I was having sex. But now I would rather
have sex and it mean something to me. So yeah I want to
hold off on the sex for like ever. Well just 5 years
anyway. Maybe? Youre right it will never happen. But it
was a nice thought while I could still think it

So anyway, Im tired, sick as hell, in love and going to
bed! I will be back tomorrow or something to write more
noninteresting facts of life.

Andrew i love you so much


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