rob250881

Rob's Online Thoughts
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2001-11-01 00:52:04 (UTC)

31/10/01

Pissed off today as my so-called friends seem to be
stabbing me in the back and having a good old laugh while
they are at it.
Went bowling on Tuesday night and while we were there I met
Kate, who I really liked and made a point of mentioning
this to the rest of the people there.
They turned around and told her best mate I was gay and
that my nickname was Fred West (a multiple killer in UK) so
that she wouldn't become interested in me. And all this
after I had helped one of them to get a date with a girl I
work with. It makes me wonder if it is all worth it,
although I know if I do decide to tell them where to stick
it I will be left on my own with hardly, if any friends at
all.
There are times like that which make it seem so obvious
that I should do so, then there are also times when we all
go out and it is just great. There is a great sense of
loyalty and comradeship, but as soon as any female enters
the equation it's straight into slagging-off teritory.
It just upsets me a great deal and does my already low self-
confidence a great boost in the opposite direction it needs
to be going in right now.
My biggest wish is that for once instead of them slagging
me and other off they would help to make things work for
each other. I experience this when I was in America for 6
months for college, and it was just surreal. It gave me an
immense feeling of closeness and openness with my friends
there and created an altogether superior atmosphere when we
were together which is missing here. I know how good things
COULD be - it just seems like things are a long way from
being that good.
With that little blurb I'm off to bed.


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