MidnightPoet

Diary Entry #5 As Written on..

Diary Entry #5 As Written on Sunday December 10,1995.

I know I haven't wrote in here lately. I"ve got a lot to
say but I know I won't have time in one day to say
everything. So I'll tell you what happened to make me write
in here today.
This guy I liked for over 3 years now is like getting
married to some girl. I've known this guy sense- like
forever!
and it really hurts my heart to hear this news! Every guy
that i've had a major crush on gets married before I like
am ready to tell him that I like him. I mean this crush is
so big that when i heard the news my world just came
crashing down. I feel like crying but If i cry my mom and
Dad will know that i like him and they've never known me of
really likeing any guy (THIS MUCH!)
another thing-I did smoke a couple of weeks after I wrote
the last entry but I also quit that same week. I'm too sad
and depressed to write about anything else right now!

Good bye!
MidnightPoet.

Diary Entry #6 As Written on Wenesday December 13,1995

I'm still hung up on Matt! I've come to the conclusion that
a lot of things could happen between now and the end of
next school year (thats when there supposed to get married)
I wrote this poem when I was in a depressed state- I find
it better that when I get depressed to write about it and
most of the time the depression goes away!

LIFE's FINAL
FAREWELL
My Heart is broken,
the tears are falling,
life goes on, they say,
but my life is balling,
because of your new wife and life.
That should be me in her shoes,
but it isn't.
It's time to die.
For, I no longer have anything to live for,
GOODBYE!

Thats what I wrote! and after a couple of times reading it
I t makes me ralize suicide is not the Way to go!
I had to go to the doctor yesterday because my face had
swollen up on one side the toher day and found out it was
some type of skin infection. It was caused by either
scratching a sore on my face and getting a germ in it or an
open sore and it got in that way. any way I'm staying home
from school and letting the sweeling go down.
I've been trying to get in touch with stef. but noone
seems to answer the phone! I'm going to try again at 3
pm..just incase she wasn't suspened-oh- wahat the hay let
me try now..
NOpe..
noone answers either she's at school at work with her mom
or her mom took the phone out because of her Suspension
(i'm not sure if she is suspenended or not)

Midnightpoet.