Chapter One: The Evil Within
2001-10-30 01:51:06 (UTC)

Who need friends, anyways?

no one, i dont need them, so a mom thinks i am a bad
influence because i hang out with a collage student that
happens to be bi and work with my mom and be a close friend
of the family, while i am in a relationship that i
absolutly love, by the way, alone in his house with him
shouldnt make me a bad influence. now if i were to do
things with that person, then yes, bad influence, but i
dont do anything! nothing. well, what can i say... i cant
change who i am, my mom trusts me and she knows i can
defend myself, and she calls to check up and such. What can
i do? OHHH OHH I KNOW ^raising hand and bounceing to get
attention,to be able to awnser question^ sit in a corner
and watch everyone else who is anything but innocent or a
good influence seen like they are, but secretly they are
doing worse things than i have ever thought of!

Okay, well to all who didnt really notice, i got my hair
cut, and it's prolly everyone who is reading this, because
no one noticed that i got 4 inced taken off, but thats
okay, i dont mind if you dont care/ notice, its just me, i
thought it was a drestic change, but i understand...
i "normally have it up". its like i never left it down, but
its all the same... its all a pile of shit, everything is!

i am really stuffed up and i feel like dirt, and there are
alot if things on my mind, and i am happy but not, and i am

today is 4 weeks and on the 1st it will be 1 month! :) i
really like darren! i love darren, he is so cute. and his
brother is an apple. TODDS AN APPLE and his mom is
sweet, "thanks darrens mommy".

nearing another emotional break down...

its really hot!