Journey of Infertility
2001-10-29 14:57:10 (UTC)

April 1998 to October 29, 2001 the beginning............

Well here we are. I will begin in the middle of my journey,
I am hoping that it is closer to the end but I have doubts
that the end is anywhere near.

To give some background info, I am Darcie married to Scott since
January 1992, we have been TTC (trying to concieve) our first baby
since April 1998, longer really because I have never used birth
control, but in April 1998 we made a decision to start trying. Well,
the months came and went and nothing happened. October 98 rolls
around and I start getting panicky and start reading everything I can
about TTC. I start taking my tempature every morning to see
when I ovulate so me and Scott can time sex correctly. We
do this through Thanksgiving 98, Christmas 98, New Years
99, Valentines Day 99, until April 1999, one year of trying,
when again I get so fed up I finally call to make an
appointment with an OB.

We go in together, I am nervous, Scott is nervous. We don't
know what to expect. Having babies is supposed to be
natural and easy, but not for us apparently. We see the OB
and she starts by asking questions about our sex life, she
looks at my BBT charts and decides to take a bunch of blood
from me and and do a SA on Scott. A few days later she
tells us my blood work looks fine, but she wants to make sure
so she orders a HSG (dye through my uterus and fallopian
tubes to make sure they are open) for me, she says that if
I come back OK and Scotts SA is OK, she'll put me on
clomid. I have the HSG done in May 99 and all is OK, my
uterus is normal and my tubes are open, Scotts SA is great,
somthing like 80 million sperm. So we are fine, whew, what
a relief.

So we go home with my prescription of clomid to help me
ovulate and we have sex. Still nothing, but we keep trying.
In August my OB leaves to, of all things, have a baby, and
I am in limbo land while we wait for a new OB and I am on
no meds.

Still waiting...

By now it's November 99, my 10 year high school reunion is
coming up and I plan to go, but I didn't make it. I was
Oing on the day I was to go so I stayed home to have sex.
Having no faith I would get pregnant, but I still have to try.
Thanksgiving Day rolls around, my period is a no show....


I get up at the crack of dawn and go to the Walmart that is
open 24 hours and buy a home pregnancy test. Scott isn't up
by the time I get home. I sneak into the guest bathroom and
pee on the stick...

OMG, It's positive. I see two lines. I'm pregnant. We are
due August 2, 2000.

The first thing through my mind isn't joy...its "what have
I done" I run into the bedroom and wake up Scott, I ask if
he can see the 2 lines, he can, and he hugs me. Its
finally over, we are pregnant.

We call everyone..I mean everyone and announce the good
news. I had no reason to think that we would not have the
baby. We get the usual congrats and go on to have a
fantastic Thanksgiving.

On Monday I start bleeding. We go to the ER and it is
confirmed that I am miscarring, my beta hCG was only 11. I
cry and cry.

We are told we can try again, the loss was so ealy that
there was no need to wait a month or two...so, we are at it
again. I call and make an appointment with the new OB we
are finally assigned to, not expecting anything to happen on its own
again, and to get started on the medication again adn see what a new
Dr thinks.

So, I am taking my temp every morning and timing sex on the
right days during December waiting until when we finally see the new
OB in mid December and make an appointment for Jan 00 to start a new
round of testing. But my period dosen't show and on Chrismas eve I
pee on another stick and its positive.

Again we are pregnant. We are estatic, we can't possible
miscarry two times. We hold off telling anyone just in case
but I do go have my blood drawn to get the pregnancy
confirmed. It comes back at 110.6 yup..we are preggers!! But the
happiness is short lived....I start to bleed again 4 days
later. I don't bother going to the ER this time. I have an
appointment to see my new OB in a few days so I'll ask
about it then.

January 2000, new OB, new round of tests. The Dr decides to
draw about 10 vials of blood. Ouch. She is testing for all
the immune diseases and problems that can cause
miscarriage, it all comes back normal. During her exam of
me she finds a large lump in my neck on my thyroid. She is
concerned and refers me to a surgeon to have it looked at
before she will give me anymore clomid.

But I test positive on Jan 31. We are pregnant again, but
On Feb 7th I start to bleed, I go in to the OB clinic and
see an on call Dr. He does and ultrasound and finds a
gestational sac measuring 5 weeks with nothin in it. He is telling
that I am fine, but I miscarry.

Late February 00. I see the surgeon and he looks at my
neck. He decides that I am hyperthryoid and orders an
ultrasound of my neck. They find another growth on the
opposite side of my thyroid. By now I am getting scared. My
surgeon does a biopsy on the larger lump and it is a cyst,
but the other growth is too small to biopsy so I have to
have an ultrasound guided biopsy done. Turns out the small
lump is folicular cells (bad) and I will have to have
surgery to remove it. Problem is, Drs don't know which
side, if any, of my thyroid is functioning normally. I
decide to have the entire thyroid removed. During all of
this I come up pregnant again in March. I have the highest
betas yet and I am hopeful that this pregnancy will survive
and I will avoid surgery, but, no such luck, I misarry
again 5 days later. Since I don't want any weird things
growing in my neck the surgery is scheduled. Scott is in
Germany so my dad comes up to help after I have the
surgery. On May 10, 2000 my thyroid is removed.

Over the next few months, I go to Germany and heal from the
surgery. Scott leaves for Bosnia in Sept 00 for 5 months,
so that puts a huge kink in the TTC dept. He returns in Feb
01 and what do you know....I'm pregnant again, this time I
get to 6 weeks. But, you know the story by now. We go away
to Myrtle beach for a marriage retreat and I start bleeding
while we are there.

We decide the army Drs just can't help us anymore and
get a referral to a reproductive specialist (RE). Its a 90 minute
trip one way, but we make the drive. I really like the Dr and she
pretty much goes along with what I want to do. She starts off by
doing genetic testing on me and Scott and doing a few different more
advanced immune tests on me. All is normal and we are given the go
ahead for injectables and Intrauterine Insemination (IUI). I am
estatic, I can't wait to start. We go to a class to teach
us how to give shots on March 7th. I give myself the first
shot on March 13th. OUCH!! I sat on the floor alone for
about 20 minutes trying to get the nerve to stick myself. I
finally did it, but it was nerve racking.

Over the next 4 days I gave myself one shot in the belly in
the evening. On March 17th I had my first u/s to see if the
shots were working. I had 13 eggs growing, 6 on one ovary
and 7 on the other. We were shocked on the drive home. On
March 19th I went back, this time I only had a few eggs
that were maturing. On March 21 I had one that was ready. I
got the big shot in my booty to release the eggs at 10pm
that night. On March 23rd at 11am I was inseminated.

We talked about baby names the whole way home.

April 4th,2001, 3 years after the start of all this, was my
first beta to see if the IUI worked. It was a 7. I was told
it was residual from the shot in my butt, but to go back in
two days on the 6th, to see if it doubles. Well, I had my blood drawn
but I never called to see what it was. My period started
and I was devastated. I had no faith that IUIs work, I was
sure we would never have a child. I wanted to give up.

On April 7th I had a baseline ultrasound to make sure we
could try again....they found 2 large cysts on my ovaries
and the cycle was cancelled. I was devastated again. We were told to
wait until my period was due and to call an schedule another baseline
ultrasound to make sure the cysts were gone then they sent us home to

Jump ahead to May 4th, my period is due, I am spotting, but
it's not a true period. I call my RE and tell them, I am
supposed to be getting another u/s so we can start another
cycle. Scott got orders to Ft Benning and we were running
out of time to try agian. The nurses tell me to take a hpt.
I laugh. I am NOT pregnant.

Well, for sh!ts and giggles I
take a hpt and befroe I finsih peeing on it it's POSITIVE!
OMG! OMG! I start crying. This means the IUI worked and I am
something like 9 weeks pregnant. OMG, I am pregnant, I
didn't miscarry.

I call OB nurse at the military hosp and asked for a beta.
She orders it for me...she knows me by now and my story. A
few hours later I call for the results....expecting a 200
or something. It's 36,422.4 OMG!! I'm really pregnant. We
are due Dec 14, 2001. The nurse goes on to tell me the beta
on April 6th was 56 so it was more than doubling back then!
Believe it or not we were at the trash dump when I got the
results. We were doing yard work all day and were throwing
out the leaves when I decided to call for the results.

I begged the nurse for a ultrasound. I was so scared and
worried there wouldn't be a baby in there. I was about 9
weeks and that was far enough along to see a heartbeat. She
slipped us in. Scott was grinning all the way to the
hospital. I was very nervous.

We got in for the ultrasound and the Dr is looking around.
He says it is too early to see anyhting. I know he is
wrong. He says to come back in a week.

I call my RE instead. She has me come in immediatly. They
drawn my blood to see if my numbers are still doubling, and
she does an u/s. She finds the baby, but its in my left
fallopian tube with no heartbeat. My beta comes back at
35,500. We are sad, but we are excited too. This is the
first time we have ever seen a developing baby. We are sure
that if it had made it to the uterus I would be pregnant. I
get the methatrexate shots in hopes to save my tube and it

In late May 01 Scott leaves for Drill Sgt school and is
gone until late July. We move to GA in August. My cycles
are not regular enough for us to be trying yet, but in
October we are trying again.......