JeffStark

In The Name Of
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2001-10-29 01:28:13 (UTC)

At whom should I be mad.

I just wanted to take a minute to illustrate exactly how
underappreciated I am. Sometimes when you realize your
friends are taking advatage of you, you think you'd almost
be better off without them. Last night was one of those
times, and it actually helped me to make a couple
decisions.

I told Ben's mom, if she wanted to let Jamie throw a
Halloween party, I'd bring over my DJ equipment, and set it
up. I told her I didn't have any new music (because I quit
DJing a while ago), but if Janie had CD's I can play
them. Ben, Elisha, Ben's mom, and Jamie must have had that
confused with me volunteering to spend my entire day, and
last night over there, totally inconvenienced, and
stranded.

I was ready to go at 10PM, which was a good 3 hours after
the party was scheduled to be over, but no one would even
think it polite to offer me a aride home, after all I'd
done for them. I ussually charge $300 dollars minimum to
DJ like that, but all I got for this was a night on a
couch, and to wake up and find my CD's strewed all over,
probably scratched beyond repair.

Then today, Erle wants me to go out of my way to bring him
one of the books from out philosophy class, so he can do
his late paper. I have more things to think about than
getting him through that class.

I think last night and today made me realize how good it
will be for me to go to either Southern Il, ISU, or Cal
Poly. I need a distance between my friends and myself.
Most of them aren't going anywhere in life, and if I want a
chance to become something, I'm going to have to leave them
behind.

I had my mail forwarded from my PO Box in Il, to my house
in CA, so hopefully I'll get my letter from Southern, and
I'll know if that's where I'm going. I'm still trying to
get ahold of Roni, to she if she'll check it for me. I'm
only going to give it two weeks, then I'm going to return
my acceptance to ISU.


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