JANET

DEAR DIARY, MARCH 14 ..

DEAR DIARY, MARCH 14
TODAY I FOUND MYSELF BORED ALL DAY. LEO IS IN
MISSISSIPPI, AND HE WON'T BE BACK UNTIL FRIDAY. HE'S BEEN
GONE A LOT LATELY THAT I DON'T EVEN MISS HIM ANYMORE, BUT
IM STILL IN LOVE WITH HIM. OR AT LEAST I THINK IM IN LOVE.
COULD IT BE THAT IM JUST ACUSTUMES TO HAVING HIM IN MY
LIFE. WHICH IS REALLY A CONTRADICTION TO REALITY BECAUSE WE
ARE HARDLY TOGETHER. EITHER WAY I FEEL HAPPY THE TIMES I DO
SPEND WITH HIM. I DONT PLAN ON LIVING MY LIFE WITH MY
IMAGINARY BOYFRIEND. IMAGINARY BECAUSE MOST OF THE TIME WE
ARE ON THE PHONE AND NOT TOGETHER. IMAGINARY BECAUSE HALF
OF THE TIME I IMAGINE HE'S IN BED WITH ME. IM HOPING THING
WILL CHANGE AND HE'LL SEE HE'S LOSING ME BECAUSE IM REALLY
ALMOST GONE. I WOULD HATE TO SEE THINGS NOT WORK OUT
BECAUSE OF THE BABY WE HAVE ON THE WAY. ATLEAST NOW EVEN IF
WE AREN'T TOGETHER FOREVER MY BEST FRIEND WILL ALWAYS BE IN
MY LIFE. AND WE WILL SHARE THE MOST IMPORTANT THING IN MY
LIFE, AND I HOPE HIS, OUR BABY.
THIS PREGNANCY REALLY HAS ME FEELING ALL KINDS OF
EMOTIONS. I GET FRUSTRATED A LOT. I SLEEP ALL DAY. I CRAVE
EVERYTHING. ITS AN EXPERRIANCE DIFFERENT THEN ANYTHING ELSE
I'VE EXPERIANCED. IT IS BEAUTIFUL, AND ALSO FUN. IM FINE
BY MYSELF RIGHT NOW BUT I HOPE HE'S THERE LIKE HE PROMISSED.