The Nightshade Princess
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2001-10-28 04:15:05 (UTC)

Forever in love...

I am so in love with Lestat. The depth of my love
only deepens and is re-affirmed with each moment I spend
with him, each internet or telephone conversation. We are
soulmates - we must be. He and I both share in intense
passion for music, have had a lot of family troubles, and
apparently the same inclination towards moodiness. Dark,
old souls are we. Hell, Heather even says we LOOK similar -
long, dirty blonde hair, sorrowful expression, pale skin,
and smaller hands than most people from either of our
genders. And then there is the matter of our matching
gothic style of dress - the same primarily black wardrobes,
the same black nail poilish, the same way of walking, head
down, shoulders slumped, quickly as possible (we both get
chided by our friends for this). Our astrological signs
are both earth, but we display largely water qualities. He
has lived with the shadow of death cast upon his soul, as I
have. He wrote me an email last night, asking me to hang
on for him. I shall... with his help I will murder Ana
before she steals me away... I will exorcise me demons
with a cross of love.
I ate something I didn't have to today.. a pretzel at
the mall. I'm a bit nausiated now, because mother made me
eat dinner too, but I know that pretzel was a victory. And
he was right there with me to share it. Lestat is one of
those people whose presence and caring attention can help a
grrl feel good about herself again. He is finally learning
to open to someone... me... I know he doesn't want to hurt
me, this feeling echoes my deepest fear (hurting someone),
but I want to share the poison within him, as he has shared
mine. The most beautiful picture I can see for us is
holding each other, tears streaming down our faces, the
echoes of an ancient demon's death cry still reverberating
throughout our beings. Something deep inside tells me this
is right.