once again
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2001-10-27 07:19:08 (UTC)


I haven't talked to Shawn yet. I called Cody's last night
at work and Donnie told me he doesn't think Shawn got the
phone hooked up yet. So I guess I shouldn't be so mad. I
had a horrible dream last night...nightmare. The kind I
got when Shawn was in jail and right when he got home. I
was chased around somewhere...not sure where or what it some crazy guy with a chainsaw. There were tons
of people there and he went around killing everyone with
blood flying everywhere. When he got to me I was running
so fast and barely staying away, but for some reason he put
down the chainsaw and picked up a knife. He caught me and
i was pushing him away and had hold of the knife along with
his grip. I woke up. It scared me so much and I don't
understand why I had it. I haven't had a dream like that
in a year. I wanted to hear Shawns' voice so badly. I
just wanted to pick up the phone and call him but I
couldn't. It took me a little while to fall back asleep.
I barely slept though. The dream took forever and it was
already 4 am then. I woke up so out of it and wanted to go
back to sleep. I miss Shawn and maybe it's a way of
telling me that I still need him to protect me.