xsuperboy

The Journal of Greg Rodriguez
2001-10-24 07:33:38 (UTC)

October 24, 2001 3:15 AM

Dear Journal,

My life is so strange. These people that I've surrounded
myself with are just ... I don't know. They make me
understand myself better sometimes, but sometimes they make
me more confused. I am so grateful for them though. They
make me feel so not alone. Gimme a break, it pretty late.
Proper sentences are just not an issue presently.

I had lunch with Joe today. It was enjoyable. Joe is
someone I just feel good being around. But at the same
time, it's like I watch what I say around him so much. It's
very weird. Like with Mitch, I don't give a fuck. I just
say whatever the fuck is on my mind, and don't really worry
how he'll react. With Joe, I'll say something funny, and he
won't laugh, and I'll dwell on it for a minute. It's like I
have to impress him. I think it's because I want as a
friend so bad. Just a guy friend who meets my "standards".
Him and I are so alike on the superficial tip. Our clothing
styles, musical tastes, and attitudes are cut from the same
stuff. But on a deeper level, I feel like we're just not
connecting. I mean we've only been really friends for a few
weeks. A lot can happen. I think time will tell.

I'm going with Mitch and Kayla home this weekend.
There's a concert; some goth-rock band called Type O
Negative. I'm not really into that idea, but I figure it's
something new, so it won't be that bad. I hope I won't
regret it. I'll write back soon. Sorry it was so short, but
I figure I should write something...later.

-Greg