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2001-10-23 22:39:18 (UTC)

bela lugosi is dead

So last year right around Halloween I was listening to some
retro thing on the radio while cleaning my room and this
goth song came on..."duh nuh nuh nuh nuh I'm dead I'm
dead.." that is what he saiD! AND I KNEW! I NEEDED TO FIND
THIS SONG! So ever since I've been looking..cause I'm a
huge dork. AND I FOUND IT! It's by some band called
Bauhaus. So yes. Just thought I'd write that. I'm listening
to Make yourself by's #11 I don't know what
the name of the song is..but it reminds me of Jason. I'm
scared. I really care about him. I swore I would never care
about anyone like I care about him...but some how it
happened anyway. It scares the shit out of me. The idea of
loosing him ....I ...I don't know. I hate it. I hate caring
about him. It's not fair. I don't know what is going to
happen. He hurt me do I know it won't happen
again? I'm in denial. I'm numb. What else is new..haha. On
a lighter note ..I'm going to see 311 tonight. I feel like
shit...probably that whole lack of sleep thing that seems
to happen EVERY day. I'm going with Candice and Katy. Katy
feels like shit too...and she's not to thrilled about
going. That's the difference between her and I. That may
not make sense to anyone but me...but that's Ok cause who
the hell reads this shit I write besides me anyway..! Yeah
so right. Jason and I might go see Tool on
that would be reaaaally cool. I'm sure that show would end
up in my top ten of all time. Music is everything. I've
been disconnected from everything lately. By choice of
course..but still disconnected. . People.