daydream disbeliever

Mad Ramblings From a Blithering Idiot
2001-10-20 05:14:05 (UTC)

Catching Up on My Life (Also Known as Ragnarok)

I know it's been quite some time since I posted last,
and actually many things have occurred since then. I'll
have to go backwards in writing about them, however,
because the events of the present are much more significant
than the past.
First of all, I wrecked my car yesterday. My volatile
father is at his brother's wedding in Tennessee at the
moment, so he has no idea. My car had just enough radiator
fluid to get me to work, and it's still parked in the Wal-
Mart parking lot, with its poor little hood smashed inwards
and upwards. It's a pitiful sight. S has been giving me
rides to and from work, bless her heart. All I can think,
however, is that when dad comes home, he will kill me. I
almost wish I had the guts to commit suicide. For the past
two nights at work, I've been forcing myself to laugh and
be cheerful because if I don't laugh, I'll begin to sob
like a baby.
And writing of work, as of right now, I am no longer a
Soft Lines Associate. I am a Shoes Associate! Tonight was
my last night. I'll miss Steph, Lis, Susan, Debbie...I
love them all; they are my best friends. I'll miss our
return-sorting fitting room bitch sessions, our cracks on
customers, and making fun of nearly everything. The
sorority feeling was so strong between us. But here I am
getting misty eyed and waxing sentimental. I can't have
that, now can I? A, however, was a cashier and now works
in shoes. She loves it. I get along with all of the
evening shoes people, so there won't be camaraderie problem
at all. My only regret is that I have to replace Jeanette,
who was possibly the sweetest person to ever work at Wally
World. She had to quit because she hurt herself, I think.
I hope she's happy, and that I will be, too.
Heheh, I'm chatting with L on AIM and she says I'll be
back in soft lines before Christmas. I doubt it. Hell, I
may be in boot camp before Christmas. I still haven't
figured out my life's path. I don't think I ever will.
I'm crying right now. I hate crying, and I do it too often.
I'll close now, and begin a new entry. It will be
focused on one topic and one topic only, heh. Until a few
minutes from now I remain the crying and semi-regretful