Life as I know it.
2001-10-18 05:14:48 (UTC)

through a crack in the drapes

Must write now.

So yeah last night everything with matt,super peachy. But
im worried and I shouldn't be at all. Seriously I shouldnt
be. I keep telling myself that, but I didnt talkto him at
all today...i tried, he was online earlier and everything
but i im'd him and he never returned the IM....which is
cool i have a tendency to not notice those type of things.
I just so want to email him and tell him how much I do want
things to work out, I just dont want to fuck things up...at
all. I mean I SO MISS HIM. And it drives me crazy, well I
do, that I do so much...and I do not want to not have him
in my life...God I would fucking marry him, if only I could
go back when he asked me to and I so would. I just cannot
see him out of my life. If I could, I'd be with him
forever. Seriously I would, I really love him, its been
monhs since we broke up, and I feel the same way now for
him that I always have....my feelings have not subsided.
And its not like i havent tried to get over him, I really
have, but no one is -him-. It's like nothing like I have
ever experienced before. It's fucking true love.