Love, Sex and College
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2001-10-17 18:15:38 (UTC)

The Beginning

Well, here goes everything....

I am writing because sometimes I feel that is all I can do.
My life is generally good, I am thankful to be alive. I
like it here at college.

I am falling in love with my boyfriend even though times
are being really hard right now. He is my first love. He is
11 years older than me, but I really truly care about him.
He means the world to me. I wish that he would just get
everything together and do what he loves. It is hard since
he works nights and I for the most part am a day type of a
girl. I have been getting wicked frustruated with not being
able to see him much. We recently (3 weeks ago) had sex for
the first time. I lost my virginity to him and we only had
been dating for a month and a half. But it was perfect. He
took good care of me. And sex is not the main part of our
relationship. Things just seem to always come up and he
can't see me. His job is killing him. Well enough about

Things otherwise are ok, I have to go to the gyno for the
first time on Friday. I want to get put on the pill and I
have been having some pain and its gotten worse in the last
few months so its time to get checked out. I really want my
boyfriend to come, but he may be too busy. School is tiring
me out. And being in pain is not helping. I should be in
class right now, but was not feeling well and could not
make it. This just sucks.

I am thinking about going home for the weekend. I have to go to the
Doctor's on Friday. I have been having really painful cramps and I
get these sharp pains, that are really awful. They make me irratable,
no one seems to understand. My dad wants to take me and Andrew out to
lunch on Sunday with my sister and my step-mom. No one except my
friends have met him. I really want my dad to meet him. I really care
about Andrew and I want to make him as real as possible to my

My goal is to quit smoking before Thanksgiving... Smoking
is bad for me, but I cannot do it cold turkey.

I am going to relax before I have my first show for the
school tv show, I am one of the 2 Entertainment Anchors, I
also have to do Laundry tonight and do my rough draft for
my English class... oh I don't want to... I hate that class.

I am off. Doing what I have to do, maybe I will try calling
Andrew to see what is up for the weekend.
I'm out.

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