The Second Half of Long Life to Live
2001-03-09 01:32:13 (UTC)

This is my first time writing..

This is my first time writing in here, it is the second
half to Timmy's. My point of view on
deepest feelings in which everyone can read. Many people
think of me as being a complicated person, however,
everything i do is normal...(almost everything). Anyway i
was just thinking to my self how highly blessed i am...not
in everyway but what god has given me is everything i could
ask for. Anyway, I have a great know who. I love
him sooooooooooooooooo much, we've have been through so
much and no matter how mad I get, or how much I want to
leave him, I can't let go! And i don't want to. I am
nothing without him, I was nothing before him and I will be
nothing after him. I was afraid to like him, and when I
liked him, I was afraid to date him, and when I dated him,
I was afraid to fall in love with him, and now that I am in
love with him, I am afraid to lose him, and if I lose him,
I will just be afraid. Afraid to be alone, afraid to live
without him, afraid to be myself, afraid to the point where
I might just give up. Give up on love, give up on my
heart, give up on myself, just give up. I don't know how
to be me without him. He is my dream man. Now and always.
I have wanted him for so long and never thought he liked me
even a little bit. Then when I found out he did, my heart
stopped beating. I went to school and told everyone but
they all said it wasn't real. But I knew it was. Then
when I first seen him, I was so shy...and so nervous...he
looked like an angel. My angel from heaven, here to help
me live, help me learn, help me love. He introduced me to
love, he showed me how great it is. Now that I started...I
won't stop. EVER!! He is so beautiful and so talented i
don't know how to even explain. Wait...I have one word for
him..................ANGEL! I love him so much! He is my
everything and what i don't have...he gives me. When i am
upset, he makes me happy. When i feel i can't go on
anymore, just one word from his mouth changes my mind. If
something is wrong, he makes it right. Although at times
we both say or do things that we regret later, and don't
mean at the time, we always overcome. We've been through
so much, and the only reason we stay together is because we
love each other. And i have messed up so badly in the past
and made so many mistakes, i don't understand how he can
love me. But if it wasn't for his love, I would have given
up a long time ago. And i am thankful for everyday we are
together. And will always be. He is the only man in my
life. So..................if I lose him, what will I do? I
love my second half, and that second half is you.

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