Just another girl

Fooling With Words
2001-10-16 04:36:45 (UTC)

I hate moving!!!

I saw Drew way too many times in school today.. I hate it,
i really do. I can't stand this!!! We need to either
completely ignore eachother and pretend like we never knew
eachother(hoping he doens't pick this option) or actually
start having conversations again. Because it gets
incredibly tedious and monotonous to just say hi on the
halls to him, 50 million times a day and not get another
word in edgewise. ugh. Our house is so empty! NOthing in
any of the cupboards or the refrigerator, they are taking
all the furniture and appliances tomorrow morning. I don't
want to go live with my grama!! I mean, I love her and
all..... but I want my own room. My sister smells. I don't
want to share with her. I have been mean to Jamie lately
for some reason. Some things have just been getting on my
nerves lately. It just seems like I have to wait for her
lal the itme, and she needs me to be with her, and she
cna't do things by herself. I am both very interdependednt
and dependednt, depending on what sort of mood I am in...
it varies extensivlely. Anyway, she just got on my nerves
this weekend at marching band because she never left my
side, and I needed some alone time, and some time being
with other people!!!! I'm starting to talk like her now too
and it bothers me!! I remember when I first started
becoming rlealy good friends wiht her, and I Hated the way
she taked because it was so unproper and she doesn't
articulate her words clear enough, and she uses too many
catch phrases, and now I am starting to sound just like
her!! AAAAHHH HELP!!!!
PSAT's are tomorrow, and I took the pre test on my own
tonight, and didn't do so well. Well, my scores were above
average, and I really wizzed through it, so I guess my bad
scored can be attributed to those two very determining
factors. I also did the math section without a
calculator. Anyway, I"m extrememly nervous. WHY? I do not
know. I hate my friends.... yes... hate my friends.. wlel
love... but dislike most of the time, as they are morons
who are mean and rip people apart for fun. NOt me.. well
sometimes... but they are just beeing sarcastic. Did you
know the definition of sarcasm is "the tearing of flesh"?
Yes... so I don't mean they are being sarcastic in the
sense you are thinking..... (although sometimes they are)
mainly they are just tearers of flesh.
R20's practice tonight went well.. I love *him*. He is
so dreamy and perfect, and has the perfect family, and the
most perfect conversations, and the most perfect eyes, and
the most perfect personality. He's one of htose
untouchables, you know what I mean? He's so perfect and
innocent(I think) that I don't want to even talk to him
because he is so clear and smart and perfect and far off
and I am just... here, even in my innocence, feeling vastly
inferior. WHY? Well, I dunno..... just the enigma of it
all. I want him..... but I can't have him.. PLus I still
miss Drew. A lot. I always to manage to make myself look
wretched whenever he is around. Accidents happen I
suppose..... speakin gof accidents.. my sister peed in her
pants today. She is 11 years old. I have no idea how that
happened, and i would prefer not to think about it. She is
disgusting, and I am terribly mean to her, and that is how
it shall continue to be, because I am a terrbly nefarious
person with an insatiable appetite for hate. yes.. that's
me alright.
MMMMmm. erk. nittles.

In sentences stolen from the diary of Bridget JOnes,

"NIce boys don't kiss like that"

Oh yes, oh yes they fucking do.

I'm so retarded.