Christine

Visions Of Life
2001-10-16 02:06:34 (UTC)

Poems From The Past

These were all written 2-5 years ago, back when I was
unexperienced in many ways...scary scary scary...lol enjoy..

Loathing

Solemnly in my own dark world,
cries echo through the walls,
stabbing my inner joy.

Screaming, I reach out, perhaps
for no one, but for a reason
to go on. Silence, a gift

From the devil. A tool, playing
with my soul. Illuminating
the emptyness in my whole.

13

Shifting through personal infinity, a
journey into life. Winding down continuous
roads, trees lined with crimson leaves, nectar-coated
promises. Inner magic, peaceful dreams,
whether myth or fact alone. But beneath
this outer shell lies a hidden flush.
A mask to hide death, the soul. Murmors
of thunder. Cries. Inner abandonment.

I grasp on to the shattered glass, looking
at freedoms vapor. Pulling the serpent
towards divine wishes, strokes of hope, laughter.
Courage. Shadows push me away, shielding
languorous lives from a lesser nobility.
Lacking compassion for the lost at heart.

Like A Small Flame

I steady myself. Twisted trees of
my being, shift the very conciousness
I hold inside. Drowning in a river
of what I am, I reach for his
hand, to pull me to the surface. Running
through my mind with little control, dragging
the torn fragements of my heart through this
maze of mass confusion. Leaves block
the wind which carries me away, the
essence which saves me from myself.
For when I am alone, the evils
of the world runneth through my mind,
corrupting it with their half truths,
waiting till the lie and the way become one.


Jagged trees hide inner lust.
Angry cries for blood.
Frozen footsteps, smoken clouds
Fear of a fallen angel
Twisted vines block the shame
Of a man consumed with hate
A cloudy sky in conflict with itself
Clouds from fire, blue sky from love
To which end does one follow?

Remains Of A Broken Heart

I have a cat. Her eyes are brown like his.
I have a room. In here, I escape.
I have a friend. My heart is forever his.
I am restless. Excitement keeps me going.
I am sad. Pain fills my heart.
I have memories. They comfort me at night.
I have tears. Like rain, they flood the streets.
I have photos. They bring a smile to my face.
I have fantasies. They save me from reality.
I have a longing. I cry out for his touch.
I have emptyness. A void fills my soul.
I have a smile. Its small but there.
I have strength. It helps me go on.
I am here. I am still standing.
I have friends. They listen and comfort.
I have a new hobby. No longer am I restless.
I have my heart. It is mine to keep.
I am happy. Laughter fills my house.
I have love. Though a different kind then before.
I have a cat. Her eyes are brown like my mom's.

Fire And Water

Water
Dripping down in a steady stream
Making puddles
Fire
Burning all around the forest
Destroying everything
Voices
Telling me to have faith
Disappearing in my tears
Trying
Trying so hard to be perfect
Losing the battle
Screaming
Inner thoughts drag me down
Im just not good enough
Silence
No more listening
I am myself
I can only be myself
Thats who I am
Fire, Water and All

The Two Paths

Voices surround me
Good, Bad
Right, Wrong
Two paths
Emerged in the woods
Is one truly worse?
Dont all paths lead out?
Following your heart shouldnt be wrong
You should let your spirit soar
Down whatever path it wants
They both go to the same place
The paths really arent that different

Shelter

My shelter protects me
It protects me from the world
From all the pain and suffering
Yet there are still holes in my shelter
Pain still finds a way in
It eats away at me
Digs under my skin and into my heart
It makes me want to cry out
Cry out in anger, frustration
I try to emerge from this shelter
Try to bury the pain
Out of my shelter I feel free
Birds sing, people laugh
I find myself laughing too
But good things dont ladt forever
Pain always finds me
Maybe not in the same form
But it still finds me
It pushes me back into my shelter
Birds no longer sing
I no longer laugh
I sit here
All alone
Waiting for the day when I can leave
Break free from these chains
And live outside my shelter
Forever

Why

I wish I was someone else
I strive to be someone different
Why cant I be that pretty girl
The boys wish they could have
Instead I am alone
No one to look inside me
No one who even cares
Why cant I be that popular girl
The one everyone wants to be around
Why cant I be that smart girl
Who gets good grades and never worries
A girl who never does anything wrong
But I am not any of these girls
I am but a mixture
A puzzle of emotions
Ive tried so hard to be someone else
That I no longer know who I am