"Why do you like me?"
Silence. The biker brigade across the street at Sevs are
revving their engines and doing wheelies, showing off for a
couple of blonde sluts in tube tops.
"I'm really not that great, you know." Hair falls across my
face, nervously, impatiently I'm pushing it back.
He sniffs, looks the other way. "Where is everyone?"
I shrug even though he's not looking at me and he didn't
see it. I think to myself, maybe he can sense it.
I want to ask him again, but I know he's avoiding the
question, he's not going to answer me if he doesn't want
to. He'll keep pretending he didn't hear me.
An army truck drives past on Nesconset Highway, painted in
fatigues. I know what Ali would say if she was here. "Whoa,
guys, did you see that truck? Cause I didn't...it just
blended right in..." Then she'd laugh, and Shoe would
laugh, and Brett would crack a smile, and I would giggle
like an idiot, and Jacki would cackle as loud as she
possibly could. Casey would come up with something clever
and sarcastic to counteract Ali's wit. Then we'd all laugh
again, and then Ali and Casey would be off in another
emotional battle of "who can be more cynical, the emo kid
or the manic depressive".
I'm suddenly very much in need of a smoke. I know he quit,
or I would ask him for one. I squint my eyes as I stare at
the people at Sevs. They can't see us, we're hidden in the
shadows by the front entrance of the diner. I feel him take
hold of my hand, his hand is warm and mine is like a little
ice cube. I inch closer to him, lean my head on his
shoulder. I close my eyes, thinking song lyrics to myself
in my head..."We live our life in our own way, never really
listened to what they say, the kind of faith that doesn't
fade away, we are the true believers..."