The Diary of S
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2001-10-13 17:03:49 (UTC)

I feel so much better

My boyfriend didn't loose his job! And that is a load off
of my shoulders.
We both got paid yesterday which is so awesome. I want to
talk to Laurie. I hope she still wants an apartment with
us. I swear I will die if I have to stay another month at
this hell hole.
I was off work and school yesterday. I let my boyfriend
take my car so I could sleep in.
I didn't get to.
My baby had a doctors appoinment. He now weighs 21 pounds
and is 28 inches long!! he's grown so much...He also got 5
shots!! 5!!!!
I felt so bad. he was screaming and crying. I wanted to cry
with him. :( My poor baby.
Anyway, we got home and I fed my little pumpkin and we took
a long nap! It was for about 4 hours.
While I was asleep I had a dream I saw my grandmother. She
died almost 2 years ago to cancer.
I dreampt(sp) I saw her. It didn't look like her but I knew
it was her. Weird. But anyway, she looked beautiful. Her
hair was white with gold highlights. She was dressed in
white and gold. God she was beautiful. She looked angelic.
Now that I think about it...it looked like her when she was
She came to me. She acted shy, like a little kid, hiding
from me. Finally she approached me telling me how beautiful
my son was and how much I have grown. She hugged me.
Telling me everything would be alright. I want to believe
her. The dream was so real. That was the only dream I
remember having but I forgot about the dream until later on
that night. I almost cried.
I miss my grandmother so much.

It rained so hard last night. I thought we were going to
have a tornado. I think some city above us did. Not sure.
I'm glad we didn't though. I'm scared to death of having a
We had a scare about a month after I had my baby. I swore
we were going to have one. Even the sirens went off. I
lived at my boyfriends house then. We all piled up in the
hallway. My boyfriend and his drunk ass step dad (who
really is a drunk and druggie)went outside like a bunch of
dump asses. But the wind was blowing so hard they came back
in. I thought we really were going to have one then too.
But we didn't. That was such a relief.
Well back to work. I have 5 more hours.