Silent Screams
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2001-10-11 23:44:01 (UTC)

Getting fed up

Im freakin short-tempered right now. like god's
not even funny, any lil' thing that i think is wrong or i
just don't like i just wanna explode and finish it all.
like shiet! it's not even funny n e sick of this
b.s. im tired of being "patient" or "understanding" it
feels like im too used. i let ppls walk on me...and i don't
want that anymore, but if i let go of all my patience and
understanding i won't be handling all dat b.s. well. I WILL
EXPLODE. i will lash it out on everyone and anyone that has
made me feel like this and i don't want dat for da sake
dat, i should be better than dat. besides if i let all that
loose i WILL be violent. no doubt on dat. i hate it, god
damn im being walked on and i won't even let myself be
heard anymore. fucken hell man! too angry...and i hate how
im being like this...this is not the person i wanna be. but
den again i don't even wanna know if i wanna be living
anymore so...either way this is not how i wanna be. this is
such b.s. im sick of it...i don't know how to deal with
problems..i need to learn how to deal with all this cuz
basically imma break down horribly one day and all emotions
will spill. damn i'd hate to be the person i lash it out