Why is it so hard for me to just sit and watch a show? Fight fight.
I have to go home to clean and I know today won't be a day of abstinence.
I feel that day won't come for me. No peace no addiction tugging at me will I get rest from.
I had my chance, it was good years of clarity and multiple goals reached. I actually made something of myself and a life I was proud to share.
Today I hide, hide at home away from eyes that can see through my facade. It's hard because there's more to be had from life but I have lost the will and strength to claim it.