Lilac lavendar2

Starting over
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2023-05-27 15:55:17 (UTC)

I had a 'test' ..

I had a 'test' yesterday on my happy, nothing but good things comes my way, life style. I drove to work even giving myself enough time to stop into that store where I seen my new bff that called me a beautiful ray of sunshine last week, well he wasn't his usual happy ass little self, I wrote about how much energy I got from this guy last week when I needed it, so this time I was expecting it but it wasn't there. I told him I said 'what's going on with you today, your flow of energy is not the same?' he said he was just having one of those days where everything is coming at you, then he smiled and said he would be fine 'just gotta get through this moment' I said "I have an idea, last week I came in and was filled up with your positive energy, this week I will give you some of my positive energy' so we grabbed hands and took a deep breath and I mentally gave him positive energy and he mentally took it. We just may be 2 random freaks who have happened to cross paths, but who are we fucking hurting? I told him I would stop in once a week and we can balance each other out so we have a standing Friday morning energy check date.

Then I continued with my live concert as I drove down the road on my way to my job that I love more than anything, and I am honored to have a job where I am given such trust and knowledge of confidential things (changing my mind set), and I did notice yesterday that I use my vape as a microphone while driving, didn't even know I did that. I am not lying when I say I have a concert everyday, in my car and my bathroom. and me and the 5 closest neighbors all love Jelly Roll, about 5 songs on repeat over and over and over, with me singing as loudly as I can, no fucks given. (well I am not sure if they love him or not, they just don't really have a choice sorry not sorry) however they probably are only hearing me sing since my phone isn't that loud, yeah maybe I should start manifesting about a private house in the country somewhere.

I got to work and I have to tell you I was just wanting the day to get over with so I could be one day closer to today JELLY ROLL CONCERT. I went in and actually played some, but I busted my ass, remember I said I had a plan. I was going to go in and get all the shit done, and just like around 3 ask the owner if I can leave, he would say yes because then he doesn't have to pay me. But when 3 oclock arrived, I was like, dang girl it's just 2 more hours, I knew Mike was running down to his dad's house after work so he wouldn't be home until around 7ish, so I decided to stay. At 4 my boss C, who I love but is also kind of over thinker, and not to bright sometimes. (example she writes on peoples bills 'this is how much is owned' I tell her it's owed, you own your house, you owe us for the prescriptions. My favorite is when she tells me to be more Pacific....I don't know how to fucking ocean???? I can be more specific tho) Anyways at 4 she decided to come in and micro manage me....WHICH I FUCKING HATE, I know the owner is stressing, but the dude bought a building with issues (against my advice I might add) and now the heating/cooling issue is going to cost a half million dollars, so he was snapping at her and so you know how that goes she has to snap at someone and since I was there.

I was explaining what was going on, but it was her tone when she first walked in and I am sure the look on my face wasn't the 'happy' one, but I didn't snap back, I held my ground, I know she wasn't understanding what I was trying to explain and I didn't know how to make it simpler so she could understand, she was trying to make a point but it was a moot point (overthinking) finally she said "IM DONE" and turned to walk out of my office, and once at the door, she yelled again "IM DONE" like really drama much? My first initial thought (test) was yeah well fuck it so am I and I was going to punch out and just leave, I didn't though. I just stayed there, I didn't do another fucking thing though, I was mostly just like shocked at how, yeah I still can get angry. But I didn't, I didn't even let it bother me, I mean I could feel all the blood rising to the surface getting ready for fight or flight mode, but I calmed myself and 'said this is a her problem not my problem, she is going through some stuff that I only know a part of, take a breath and let it go, you have Jelly Roll tomorrow, nothing is going to steal this joy'

and I was fine. I made sure not to see her until I was actually walking out for the day at 5pm on the fucking dot. I walked by her office, not stopping or stepping in but said 'have a great Holiday weekend' and left, I heard her say 'you too have fun tomorrow'

I know that a LOT of people get fucking irritated with me, I know that and maybe that's why I have always just stayed to myself, people don't like someone who is always happy, they really really really don't, but I don't give no fucks, not one single person is going to steal my joy.

I greeted Mike at the door with some sexy slip thingy under my hot blue granny robe. I would walk around the house in sexy stuff all the time but he keeps it cold in here, so it's always under the granny robe. We overstocked the warehouse at the bean factory to be able to get through this weekend. It's only 1 night that I will be gone, but it will seem like a week at the bean factory. I was up at 3am but like hell no, so I stayed in bed, at 4 Princess was wanting her treats, but I was actually able to stay in bed until 6am holla!

Mike is still sleeping, he has the next 3 days off and is besides himself with joy, mostly because I will be gone for half of those. Is it bad or sad that he is actually excited about me being gone? I can only tell my side of the marriage, I can only imagine he is as happy as I am.

I wonder how long he is planning on sleeping in? I wonder if he planned on morning sex, you know since I am leaving around 1, we have time

If I hear him start to move I am going in and I will just drop the robe on accident, so say I want it without actually saying I want it

I am living my best life and it's only going to keep getting better and better

263 days norco free

It doesn't matter how slowly you go, as long as you do not stop

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