The Dairy Of Oblivion
2023-04-11 16:30:17 (UTC)

It never stops (IM BACK AYO)

It never stops. This fucking feeling never stops. A mix of jealousy, pain and flustration. Almost a week and it’s still there. Every day and every night. I can’t focus because all I think about is this feeling. Or more like the situation that caused it. That fucking bitch replaced me only bc we were fighting. Okay, you could have felt abandoned but is that a reason to find yourself somebody else? Running away when there are problems that’s what you are? And I thought you really loved me. I thought you weren’t like them. I THOUGHT YOU WILL NEVER FUCKING STAB ME IN THE BACK LIKE ALL OF THEM WHO EVENTUALLY FORGOT ABOUT ME AND FOUND BETTER FRIENDS. I THOUGHT YOU ARE WORTH MY FUCKING YIME BUT I WAS WRONG GODDAMNIT AND NOW IM NOTHING BUT STRESS AND RAGE M. I HATE YOU SO MUCH WORDS CANT EXPRESS HOW MUCH YOU LET ME DOWN. Yes I was mean to you but have you even thought of a reason behind it? Fuck, you literally made fun of me ignored me for hours even tho you knew damn well I hate when somebody does this. You stabbed me right in the heart yes I was a bitch to you only because I was hurt. You made me feel like I was worth something then violently took it away from me. Now I constantly blame myself, every time we talk I feel like I’m annoying you and I think I even lost my personality because of trying to be the best for you. Man I just had some hysteric laughter episode hahahahah. Second time this week :). I feel so fucking worthless now, the person I loved and trusted replaced me just because we had some fucking troubles. What am I supposed to do now? Find somebody better? I literally can’t talk to people goddamn I’m too damn shy and insecure to do so.
Fuck it all. I just want for this rotting feeling to stop.
Omg anyway sorry for being inactive for so long, in January/February things started getting better so yea I had no reason to come here. But now all hope is lost. And I’m deeply sorry but I don’t respond to messages just informing