Amber's ramblings
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2023-03-30 16:55:48 (UTC)


Been talking to him today. We got into a bit of an argument. Nothing too bad. I asked him if had any of the money he owes me. I knew he wouldn't have but had to ask. He started having ago wanting to know where all my money has gone. Not that it's any of his business anymore. He said he told me ages ago that I needed someone to take control of my finances. I hate that he's right. I am bad with money. I'm impulsive if I see something I like I buy it. And to be honest I did need new clothes. So it's not like I was wasting it.

Parents will be home tomorrow and I'm actually impressed I made it through as well as I did. I've really missed them. I was talking to my niece about them earlier. I was saying how great they are. Not just them but their kids as well. How did I get so lucky to find people like them. They've looked after me this week while the parents were away. They have been lovely. Neither of them drive so I've been taking them out this week. I don't mind doing that. I'm glad I can help.

A few weeks ago I got a tattoo. It was either that or self harm and I don't want to do that again. Anyway I think it's slightly infected. Some of it has healed ok but there are bits that are sore and a bit red. I'll keep an eye on it over the weekend and see if it gets better. I've never had a problem when getting a tattoo. I know how to look after them. So I can only guess that it's a problem with the tattooist.

I'm doing all I can to keep my mind occupied. Trying to drown out the voices. Trying to ignore them and stop myself from thinking about him. It's not working. I don't want to be thinking about him. But because we've been talking he's on my mind. A lot. I wish he wasn't.