Slowly descending into madness
Ad 2:
2023-02-21 16:33:33 (UTC)

*screams in agony*

How long has it been since I wrote here?

When I say, wrote here, I don’t mean about my new crushes. About how I am actually feeling recently. What I'm hiding from. What I actually want to express but I can't.

I have a high fever. 71 years ago Bangladeshis sacrificed their lives for Bengali language and 71 years later they're saving my ass from going to office (today's a national holiday).

High fever makes you want weird things. A slight feeling of অভিমান। We Bangladeshis express our feelings with this word that doesn’t have any exact English translation.. You can say it's a softer feeling of anger. For me, it's a deeper kind of sadness that no one is holding me in their arms cause I need it, I need the adoration badly.

I want to be loved right. I don’t want to say anymore that I miss being loved. That asshole, whom I fucking loved for 2 years has been on a mission telling people it was all one sided from my side. So you can't say you miss being loved if you haven’t been loved in the first place.

Fucking asshole.