The lonely codependent

Please don't leave me!

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So, I've started learning Spanish after all because life is very boring at the moment. A guy last year (I told you it was a crazy year for me) told me that would be difficult. If I could, now I would reach out to him and tell him he was totally right. But where is he? Nowhere! Just like all the other people from my past.

This is one of the things that make me tired mentally the most: everybody always leaves and nobody ever says. Letting go always takes a lot of energy and mental resources for me and I basically don't even have an existing pattern of a lasting relationship regardless of its type (friendship, romantic, etc).

Yet another pattern that needs to end. I need stable connections to build my new life upon. Without them everything will just fall apart again and again.