barefoot & barely lifelike
friyay the thirteenth
soooo the two hour late night nap i took on wednesday has been the only sleep i've gotten since ... tuesday morning? monday? i can't even remember. either way it's been like four days, and it's getting absolutely ridiculous. idk why it's started happening again, this staying-up-for-more-than-two-days-straight -bit. i was done with it for years but these past like ten months it's been on like donkey kong. i guess i should give the new (or like, 'new'. i tried them when i was 16) meds a try, but for some reason the thought of them gives me anxiety. oh, and talking about anxiety - obviously since i haven't been sleeping *and* have a stye that makes me not fucking see, i was anxious as f at the paja today. i went there right when the doors opened, or like ten minutes after. j got there right after and we had a nice long chat in the kitchen while we drank our morning coffees. we had talked a bunch on ig the night before, mostly about her conflict with m and the things that happened there. i *love it* when there's drama i'm not a part of, lmao. i don't ask a lot of questions or like pry or anything usually, but dang. i'm one curious bitch, and i've been living for this case. we also discussed some people we're not the biggest fans of; i like that i can be honest with her and i feel like she's totally honest with me, but the discussion never gets nasty, even when we talk about people who are, well, somewhat obnoxious. we also talked about s's age, and today j asked them about it, so i finally know how old they are lol. spoiler: older than i thought. older than anyone thought, apparently; o immediately told them he thinks they're "well-preserved" ... lmao, i can't with people who go around thinking 40 counts as 'old'. it was a super cringey conversation but thankfully j said nothing about me, so i survived.
one of our interns had their driver's license test today and didn't pass, so she was pretty bummed the entire day. the supervisor sounded like a dick tbh, and one of those who have made a principle out of never letting anyone pass at their first try. i felt so sorry for her and told her to fuck it. she blamed it on it being friday the 13th and said something about her horoscope - i couldn't tell if she was serious or not. anyway the conversation about her driving test and driving altogether was really fun, we hung out at the salon, o, v, s, the intern (h) and i. later i added two little collage poems into my teeny tiny book; one of them i really liked and the other one i kinda hate. i might change it or rip the page out, i'm not sure yet. m came into the atelier when j and i were in there > j obviously left > he started talking to me. hella awkwardly but anyway. i think he's an ok dude, although j definitely has a reason to avoid him. i played a few rounds of solitaire and then just ... went to the 'forest' room, away from everyone else, as one of my antagonists had appeared and was talking super mega loudly about their issues and not listening to anyone else, as per usual. i read a few chapters of 'the exploits of moominpappa', rested for a bit, did my best to avoid getting a panic attack (i did succeed) and then answered a's video call. she had e with her, jo was in the daycare, n sleeping and ju, of course, working. while we were talking and goofing around i realized today marked the 30th day since my mum picked up my h&m order for me when i had covid, so if i wanted to return something today would be the last day to do it... and i really did, want to return things i mean. like 90% of the things, unfortunately. i do love everything i kept though - me likes a LOT a lot! going through all of it took me aaageees, and kinda fucked up mine and mi's schedule for the night. i left the paja early to get the return done before five-ish - which was originally the time i promised i'd be at her place, but that didn't happen (duhh). i was at mi's around 7:15 pm, britney darn it. she fed me and we had glogg, she cleaned a bit, organized some cabinets, took w out because i didn't feel like it. all that angel-like shit. she even hung a mirror she's been meaning to for *months* hahah. we hadn't seen each other in a while because first; she had quite a long christmas vacation away from here, and second; i have been ill as an elf... but today we had a lovely time, as always.
after all it was a pretty good friyay. i ended up driving home at around 1:22am (it's 4:25 now, and i'm still not feeling sleepy. just in case anyone was wondering). the stye also hurts like crazy and itches like a mf! oh, and i'm hungry. ok that's enough complaining - these past few days have been better than wednesday was, and better than they should've been with no sleep, so i'll call it a win. i got a message from work saying things might get busier in a few weeks, i've made a new friend, and yesterday i talked on the phone with my girl m for three hours. i got miself some cool new clothes i desperately needed (even if i have no idea how i'm gonna pay for them..) and even survived *this day* without hyperventilating my ass off at the paja. so. all's good.