⚡ Silent Thunder ⚡
⛈️ The Storms Within ⛈️
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Hope For A Friend
After my walk this afternoon I was watching the show on Netflix "Cooking with Cannabis"
I don't know why the thought of getting high is so appealing to me lately?
I couldn't help but think of 🐢. I knew she would find it funny because I always gave her a hard time about always wanting to be high when we were together.
I've always been sort of a good girl... The worst thing I do is drink. But I have never done any kind of drugs... unless you count caffeine..lol
So, I called her with the confessions of what I was watching and that I was kinda fantasizing about getting high. I don't think I would ever smoke it...but I'd definitely try a pot burger...lol
She didn't seem to be in the mood..So I asked her what was wrong.
She is in the hospital..
She has diabetes and has an infection in one of her toes. They are going to have to amputate. She has already lost most of her other toes.
Needless to say, she was feeling depressed and asked if she could tell me something that she has never admitted out loud...
Of course, I said sure...
And she told me that she is scared that there will come a point where she can't take care of herself..she wouldn't want to live anymore because she doesn't want to be a burden on anyone. Honestly I get that.
I didn't know what to say, other than that I know she is to smart, and to stubborn to take her own life. But in her head she is already making preparations.
On a good note, she does say that she wants to get her shit together and get healthy.. She wants to live.
That statement makes me more confident that she will be okay. She is in the hospital.. though I am a little disappointed that she went into the ER on Monday and is still in the ER waiting to be transferred to another hospital. They could at least get her a bed...
Anyways, she apologized for laying all that on me.. We haven't even seen each other in almost four years.
I just want people to know..
I don't care who you are, you can be my best friend or my worst enemy. If you are having suicidal thoughts or thoughts about self harm.. I will listen without judgement and if I can, I will get you the help you need. You don't have anything to feel sorry about. I'd rather you talk to me than try to deal with it yourself.
Just wanted to put that out there.. Also if you could send some prayers or positive vibes her way I am sure she would appreciate it..