A Tree

My Diary
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2022-12-15 00:17:36 (UTC)

About a woman

There is a known person to my mom. I never saw her. My mom and she got reconnected after 35 years or so. After 1.5 years of the woman's marriage, her husband became paralysed because of an accident. She left her job and decided to take care of her husband. Fast forward to 20 years, now she keeps crying, "what I got in my life?" She is pretty negative and keeps regretting it all the time.
Now, whatever happened to her or her husband is bad. I can't deny it. But becoming negative and crying all the time: I have a serious issue with it.
When her husband had the accident, she had two options:
1) She is thinking about her future thoroughly and is figuring out the outcome of the marriage. Therefore, leaving her husband and starting a new life.
This might look like a harsh and selfish decision, but maybe it could be good for her.
2) She is deciding to be there for her husband.
This is a great kind decision. I can say she really loved her husband. She chose this one. I have no complaints. In fact, I am proud of her decision.
Now again looking at the situation, she could have done two things:
1) Leave everything and full time take care of the husband. Which she did. For me, it's a great love story. Like, sacrificing this that etc etc. I am like wow.
But after 20 years if she is crying, I can't understand it. I mean, it was your choice. No one forced you. If you are doing something at least do that with your whole heart.
Anyway, let's talk about point no two.
She could have continued her job. She could have asked for some temporary leave. Maids and nurses are available here at cheap prices. She could have opted for one. They could have taken care of her husband in her absence. She could have her own life, her own world. She could have felt less depressed.
Even still now, she can join any community. Get some fresh air. If you have decided to live that life, live it a little bit positively.
I don't like people who always have a victim mentality. It is obvious that all people have their unique types of problems. All are dealing with them. If you are adding more sadness in their life, they wont tolerate it for a long time. People will hear your sad story for once, or twice or thrice. Afterwards, your sad story will become a hate story for people.

Anyway, I replied to all the messages. It took me more than 3 hours. All my replies started with: sorry for this late reply...
I also baked a cake. I am having body and stomach aches. I am feeling pathetic right now.