DanniCharlotte

Back to work

Today has been the longest day
Meant to leave at 6 but couldnt do it
Talked myself round
Left just before 8
Stopped twice on journey as couldnt carry on
Turned around once and started to drive home but turned back
Got to work half 10 and sobbed to my manager in the middle of the car park
She helped me in and then someone hugged me which made me cry again
I held it together for a bit after that and went out for a coffee and supervision
Still feels weird being out sitting amongst people enjoying life and enjoying a coffee
Inside I wanted to punch them all in the face
Got back and was ok for a bit then got upset, pulled myself together then got upset again
Managed till about half 4
Not even manage 6 fucking hours without needing to finish early
Pathetic
Cried again to manager and then to a friend as walked out the door
Relief and exhaustion
Drove back to Ryan's as couldnt bear to go home

Cried almost non stop since got home
Cant carry on like this
I dont think I can face tomorrow
More new people not seen today to face
But cant work from home

Everyone says it will get easier each day
I hope so
As this non stop crying and making a fool of myself cant go on

I'm wobbly weak tired upset and no fucking use to anyone!!!!