Moctimore

I'm horny as fuck

Lately I've become more depraved. I began to masturbate more often and at the same time get pleasure. I don’t know what it is connected with, there are days without self-pleasure, and there are days when my penis just hurts.
It's not that I can't control myself. I always masturbate either in the morning or before bed before while watching porn or reading pornographic stories.
I started to like men with a feminine physique a lot more than women. I was a homophobe for a long time, but in recent years I have radically changed my point of view. These are new sensations. I don't even know what to say. There are a lot more people with different sexual preferences in my environment than before, and I don't know how to discuss sex topics with them. After all, I used to despise everything that was not traditional, but now I want to discuss such things, but I don’t know how. How can I identify myself? I described my sexual preferences in an anonymous chat and was told that I am not gay or bisexual. How do other people define themselves and how not to look like an idiot in this thread?
One of my close friends is gay and I think he is even trans to a small extent. I never told him what my preferences were. I mentioned my ex-girlfriend but I never directly told him who I like. He is a very sweet and somewhat naive guy. If he didn't live in the States, I might try to start a relationship with him. He really likes my drawings and if he didn’t fit and was sincere, I think he likes me as a person. He is still a little naive but has a temper that touches and pleases me. My ex was like a boot camp in terms of relationships. In order to properly satisfy her, I had to masturbate before sex so that I could hold out longer, give her cunnilingus or massage before sex, fuck her only from the back, since she had only one ji point and, if possible, stimulate her clitoris, since in her the vagina had no nerve endings. EVERY FUCKING TIME!
I didn’t have other sexual partners besides her, and if so, then I’d rather just masturbate until I turn gray.
But I fantasized about my friend. From what I understand, he is very thin and timid. At the first sex, I would give him a massage that he would never forget. I would use a warming herbal oil and make him completely limp and not be able to raise his arms high, then I would move from the foam massage to the sides and thighs wrapping around his waist and begin massaging his cock. Then I would pick him up and turn him over on his back and kiss him on the lips and masturbate his rod. Women are generally disgusting at masturbating to men, they never know the strength and pace and angle that is needed for pleasure.
He would have moaned and shifted his legs, stretching, but because of the massage, he was weak. And then I would fuck him in different positions. And for the second time after the massage, I would start using toys and bandages, of course, if he could. I love it when someone is defenseless and timid. I'm not a fan of hard BDSM, but I like some elements. There may be spanking and covering the eyes with a mask or bandage, but this is optional, the main immobilization. Oh and after sex I will cooking best meal what he ever have before. Or maybe he's just not a fan of it all. In any case, these are just my fantasies. But he directly looks like "I would kidnap him, love him, fuck him and cook him breakfast until the sun rises and sets aww" hi so shweeet sometimes when we are chatting.