I Hate Middle School
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Girls Are Kinda Hot Ngl
Welcome back to another episode of I don't know what the fuck I want! Where we discuss things such as today's topic; do I actually like boys or am I just lying to myself because the pansexual flag is pretty? Cause, like, girls are REALLY HOT. I like nonbinary people too but the only man I've ever felt attracted to in any way was trans soooooo... Idk, I didn't know him when he was a female so I always thought of him as a guy but idk maybe my brain was subconsciously being an asshole??? Meh, idk, this hurts my brain. Is there a thing for liking anyone except for biological males? Cause I only really like biological females as transphobic as it might seem to some. Speaking of which, it is NOT transphobic to not want your gf to have a dick, or your bf a pussy. It's not that trans people arent valid, it's like not wanting a partner with blonde hair. It's not quite that simple but it's not hard to understand either-
But back to hot womennnnnnn... I finally had a sleepover at Siennas last night!!! It was me, her, and Kayla and it was sooooo fun! We talked a bit about drama at school, I did my anime girl voice for some random kid I don't know over the phone named Geramy (yes, with a G), and read Haribo sugar free gummy bear reviews lol. Sienna gave me a pair of bamboo chopsticks and Kayla gave me a bag of strawberry filled marshmallows. And, full disclosure, we made a LOT of gay jokes. It wasn't actually sexual but in terms of joking it was a night with a LOT of sexual themes. It's fun though. Girls are hot. Too bad Sienna's aromantic now... Speaking of which, she finally admitted she used to like me at the sleepover. I was like "you and your friends are so obvious" and she was like "really?" Like it wasn't obvious. Either way though, she keeps giving me these little gifts so I figured I'd pay her back with a bigger gift. At our sleepover, she showed me this crochet mushroom bag ( https://www.lovecrafts.com/en-us/p/mushroom-bag-crochet-pattern-by-teenie-crochets ) she really wanted and I can crochet so like, why not make it for her? So stay tuned for that!
Another thing I've been thinking about lately is Vinny. He broke up with Athena a few days ago and he's been extra out of it since. He spent half the last drama club meet and 99% of every lunch just staring off into the abyss. It's scaring me. Again... According to him, he broke up with Athena not because he doesn't love her anymore but because he's been stressed lately and thinks she should find someone better than him to love her like she deserves. When he said that I just kinda stared at him. I couldn't help it, that's really selfless of him. Honestly, it hurt me almost as much as it hurt him just to see him this upset and feeling like that about himself. I ended up just telling him that it was a very selfless thing of him to do and some other forgettable shit. Later in the week, at drama club specifically, he just seemed especially down so I decided to just kinda keep talking to him to keep his mind off things. I don't know if it's that obvious what I'm doing but he's been talking to me a lot more lately and we're even trying to plan a day to hang out and I can finally teach him how to put on that eyeliner I got him forever ago.
Update; did not hang out with Vinny, and I'm still unbearably lazy. I'm gonna start a new entry now so buh byeeeeeee!