Lilac lavendar2

Starting over
2022-10-27 16:11:02 (UTC)

Beautiful day

It's only 49 degrees but it is beautiful out right now. I could actually lay out right now, the sun is so bright. Around our parking lot at work we are surrounded by trees and the colors are beautiful. Lunches are boring and a complete waste of time. I would rather work through and just leave at 4:30.

We still aren't talking, other than we are still polite to each other. He said he would leave this weekend, not sure if he really is. I did tell him that I don't want to lose him

But then re reading my old diary

What did I do for him?

Everyone well not everyone but when some one is mean it seems bigger I guess. I was just using him for everything he did for me, I didn't love him

What did I do for him???

He never let me do anything, seriously Mike did everything, he wanted to, he loved taking care of his Queen. I can't explain it, his dad is the same way they love and take care of their people.

What did I do for him???

I made him smile again. I gave him confidence. I gave him love, unconditional love. I motivated him to be the very best man he could be. He took his store 10 years ago and got it up to top 5. We went on a cruise, got engaged, then he got diagnosed with MS, then married 10 days later. I never left his side other than to work or care for Chad.

Then I gave him help whenever he needed it, I showered him. I loved him when he couldn't get out of bed. During all of hid sick time. He still was my rock

So what did I do for him, maybe not a whole hell of a lot, but I did love him that's the truth

Lunch is over, gotta work now that the money train is leaving (yes people said I was only with him for his money funny how I was never about money ever.