Gentleman ♀

Today Was Good, Then Math Happened

Hi,

I'm not really sure what to say rn, I guess I just noticed how happy I've been lately. Everything's been going pretty good. I was reading some of my old entries and I was so unhappy I didn't even realize it. Now I'm happy! I was looking back to when I first found out Athena and Vinny were dating and I was so scared for our friendship and everything but now I'm doing okay! They're doing good too. They sit next to each other every chance they get and when me and Vinny were talking by the busses he gave Athena a quick hug and my heart just melted. I was like awwwwwww and Vinny didn't even care. Then last night at drama club my mom was at Aldi so we decided that Vinny would take me home but my mom finished shopping early so she arrived before Vinny's mom even left so we just took Vinny home. It's funny because we were still the last people to leave. We were standing out there in the cold for like 20 minutes.

Whelp- as soon as I was feeling good... I'm literally going to fucking cry. Well, technically I did cry. I was just chillin' there, minding my business when my mom decided to give me an hour-long lecture on how I don't do what I'm supposed to in class and how we need a meeting with my teacher and why the hell I cry about math. Eventually, she ended up having me do the math and guess what? I ended up crying and going downstairs where I just cried on the new bathroom floor for like 15 minutes. When I came back up we argued some more but it was alright-ish after I took a shower to cool off. Then we went to Spirit Halloween where I saw the shirt in the photo above. I wanted it so bad but my mom said no. Not because it was too expensive but because it said "demon" on it because god forbid we have the word demon in our house. I thought it might be because she thought it meant that her precious cats were demons so I asked her again. She said no (which I still didn't understand why) so I asked for a pair of earings that said Not Today Satan on them but once again, GOD FORBID I question her!!! She ended up yelling at me all the way home and now here we are. I made two cuts on my hip and three or four on my shoulder. It's been so long since I've cut, especially on my shoulders but I think mom's on-edge-ness plus my sudden shift from best day in a long time to a terrible day, that's what finally did it for me.

Another thing that happened to me... While we were in the pod waiting for busses to be called, Riley left me to go take a piss. While she was gone I hear "Gentleman" (my name obviously). I turn around and see that little shit Ayjay. Like, who tf names their kid Ayjay? But anyways, he once went to a church fair and asked an entire line of girls for their snaps or whatever. I was there and ended up yelling at him while his friend Cali filmed the whole thing. He also made fun of my hair and is just genuinely annoying. On the other hand though he's complemented my outfit and said hi to me in class or the hallways so idek. But anyway, then I hear "you're a babe." Yep, this kid called me a babe. I say what and he repeats himself. I say I know but reject him and try to play it off like I don’t want to disappear but I think it’s pretty obvious. His friends are like “come on, he just wants to date you” but I still decline and name all the reasons why. He’s just an asshole. Apparently he does shit like this too all the girls at school Xb specifically the “emo” ones 🙄 god I hate people

I’m gunna end this one here but I’ll write more soon. Buh bye!

~ Gentleman