GoodGirl

Broken Privates

Dear Diary,
Feeling a little off today. We got in bed after dinner once again. We did end up having sex and fooling around but I noticed I had some discomfort inside of me. Just certain angles didnt feel right. But if I moved to diff positions it was fine.

I was tired, and I so cant wait for the day he can be on top of me again. You know how there are times you are just so tired of doing all the work on top and the thrusting and your exhausted? Well I used to be able to flip over and be on the bottom, but since knee surgery he isnt okay for that position at this time. So I think that is why me on my back on the edge of the bed had become one of our go to positions often these days, plus our new bed height is perfect for it.

We ended up going to sleep before midnight, just snuggled up and gone... Woke up around 7am and snuggled him from the back, he had to get up as he had physical therapy. I went to the rest room and realized I had blood. I just had my period about 2 wks ago so its too soon for that. I was also feeling uncomfortable this am, like this weird twinge in my pussy, but also in my abdomen. Ive had this dull ache on the left side of my abdomen and I figured I strained a muscle or something, well I was reading up on Fibroids, as I do have them in my ovaries, they are small my dr said and not of concern to do anything about. But I guess when one ruptures? Or is being expelled? Or dying, not sure the correct term, you can have a pain right where I described, and also bleeding. So that is something to consider... but will see if the bleeding goes away and is just temp. I just said to hubby this am "You broke my vagina" and how I might also have just some injury inside of me too. As its been very frequent, and a few things (piercing or nails) could have done something. So Ill chill for the day and see if the bleeding stops. I was just listening to that Couple Next door podcast and they had this woman come to fulfull Js fantasy of 2 women in his bed for a wknd type thing, and the gal by the end of the wknd was bleeding and swollen and was bleeding and she said "You broke my vagina" so it was just fitting to use that line.

So bleeding, a little discomfort, exhaustion, will give you a change from a sexy mindset(sometimes!)

Our guests have left from Germany, super nice couple. Have to go clean up the place today. They are much older, white hair, but in great shape and active, they hiked, swam, etc, said they are now without kids in the house and traveling.

So I was listening to the podcast episode I mentioned above. Its episode 66. Basically this young 20 something swinger wife comes to stay with them for a wknd, they have never met, and they are going to share a bed, go out as a threesome, etc. Its really thrilling the first half for me, and my husband even came in to listen to part of it. But the things I did notice, which the swinger wife played off as not that big a deal, was the being in bed, they are snuggled up, and fall asleep quickly, the new party and husband, and wife doesnt want to snuggle, turns away, gets up early and opens the curtains and wakes them up. Or they were all out and her husband held hands with the gal, but in the way he holds them with his wife (they hold with their pinkies) and its the little things like that, when you listen to these podcasts and people ask if the get jealous, its often not the sex itself. Its little things like that. Like the We Got a Thing couple, it was seeing his wife holding a guys hand while talking sympathetically. Now they have all said they have worked through it and they are fine, but those are the things that feel intimate to your partner in the lifestyle and at times can trip you off to feel something like envy, jealousy, etc

So I listen on to this hot sex wknd, and I think if it had been 1 night, it would have stayed more hot fantasy. But 2 nights? Id want that other female out of my house, a lot of couples will not allow a sleepover or the person to be in their bed after the sexual acts. Its one of their rules. This was the wife wanting to fullfill her husbands fantasy. They all went out as a group and the wife didnt like the attn drawn to them, so they were at a museum and she preferred to go off by herself and look around and leave her husband and the extra gal alone together. The gal ended up bleeding and being sore from sex, swollen, and then by the last day was crying and missing her own husband (who was in England and she had not seen in over a month) she felt bad, they said it was fine and it made her real and normal, etc. But it really gave you the wake up to reality of the whole hot and sexy wknd, if she had left after that first night the fantasy would stay all hot, but as it went on longer, the discomfort, the reality, shows itself. Its Real of course and like anything, we get thrilled by the high points, and not the low ones or things that dont go well, we leave all that out.

So my critique thus far on the podcasts. Accidental Swingers, I enjoyed listening to them, but also got angry or bothered often by some of the things that the wife did, said, etc. Because I found a lot of what she was getting outside the marriage were things you can do with your partner and I felt bad that those 2 werent connecting over those things and had to find another party for it.
We Got a Thing couple - Had respect for them, learned a ton, theres is more educational, topics, but there is some sexy stories thrown in but they are also not big on kiss and tell and in depth info about things, so they sound less kinky, but they arent, they call themselves the old couple, but I dont think they are much older, Late 50s perhaps now? Not sure.
That Couple Next Door - Im almost up to date, have about 10 or more episodes to go, Ive found them fun, exciting, like the friendships they have built. I got my first twinge with this episode I mentioned of discomfort and feel J is pushing it a bit too far and did some inconsiderate things over that wknd, and I felt bad for K the wife on that one, even though she says its all fine.

So yeah, not sure whos podcast Ill listen to next.

So yeah, Im feeling so far removed from sexy this am, its a different feeling as I feel like Ive been on some sex high for so long, and I feel like Im removed as of the moment.

I have to call my gf L today and get those cards done, didnt do that yesterday.