Slowly descending into madness
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It's been a while since I've been to this library. Years ago, all I ever did was spend my time on the upper plaza or in the library. I don't know that girl anymore. I don't know who I am anymore. I want to do something without any restrictions of time or any other routine. I've been insanely busy ever since my university opened. And it stinks that I do not allow myself to have a little bit time. I feel insane. I feel like someone who is dying, it feels like everyday is going so fast, my life is flashing before eyes and I cannot take a break. Do I make sense? I'm at a bad place physically as well. My blood pressure is high as fuck.
Here's what I'm going to do. I'm going to check weather forecast. I'll sit by the lake on a rainy day and I'll play music loudly. and I think it would make me calm. That's what I want now. That's what I need now.