Tati

City of Lights

An unsteady gait.
Surrounded by people and yet alone.
Unknown. Unseen. Unheard.

I am akin to a ghost.

How should I stop thinking about it?
I’m much too aware of the people around me.
How could I ever stop caring, worrying about my perceived image?
How could I ever focus on what actually matters? What isn’t futile.

I don’t know how. I’m suffering because I don’t know how. I’m feeling low because I don’t know how. Confidence issues are one thing. But put that into a social environment and now I want to die.

I wish I’d stayed home but there’s no point in wishing. But looking forward, all I see is the same worrisome day over and over and over and over and over and-