Tati

Resentment & Dreads

I originally had a plan for this entry.
But now I’m not so sure.
All I know is that I won’t be talking to my father for a long time—he left me.
I certainly won’t be getting that expression out of my mind for who knows how long.

Disgust. Anger. Disappointment.
Why did he even storm out there to get me and then leave me up there all alone?
All I know is that my mom cares.
Maybe he just wants the honor of having his entire family saved.

I won’t be able to listen to music either.
Maybe ‘sad church music’ 😭 and white noise
I’ll be writing
Writing down dreams
And making prayer notes
Talking about church more too because there are just so many failures I have there to go over.

I might even switch places with N in the car. Just so i can stay away from he