Slowly descending into madness
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2022-05-19 11:26:57 (UTC)

I hate everything about BBA

Every term paper month kicks me in my invisible nuts and makes me wonder why tf am I studying BBA. Is the lower back pain worth it? No. Is the 3 hours of sleep worth it? For a goddamn marketing major? Absolutely not. My legs feels like they're going to fall off. I fucking can't do this. I came home, I slept, I don’t remember how I had dinner or whether I had it at all, I wake up around 3:30 am, I finish my slides and term paper. Then I put on heavy make up, for fucking presentation so I don’t look like a hobo. And then quiz and presentation goes on until I get on bus. Then I sleep with my mouth open in the sun, I think I'm going to have a heatstroke soon. Beautiful and tragic end of 4th year haha.

I noticed my man stopped reacting on everything after 11th. If this isn’t the cutest hint on earth then idk what is. However, still not going to text, I'm in such a baaad position, I don’t have energy for anything and anyone, not even for a lunch/dinner. And definitely not stable enough for a passive aggressive episode of "why did you text, why can't you leave me alone, you’re toxic and manipulative blah blah blah blah". I need mental peace and I don’t have that, but I'll let him have his mental peace. He pretty much convinced me that I'm bad for him. And that's okay, I'll maintain my distance.