no name
2022-04-27 15:03:03 (UTC)

remb84·4 ..

4 yr. ago
I faked loving myself until I actually did started to love myself. Also, one thing that helps is to behave with yourself like you would with your child. You wouldn't tell your kid they're a useless little dumb fu** that everyone hates, would you? You would encourage them, help them and comfort them. Behaving like that with myself is now instinct, and I've only started doing this about two years ago.

"You need to understand that you are not your thoughts. You are merely the observer of the experience."
Then what am I? Because these words, these thoughts, are all I have to express 'myself' and if what is being expressed is not myself, then what am 'I'? What is 'I'??? Limited to this body?
Doesn't even matter.
none of this makes sense

and it makes too many waves in my emotional and mental state than im comfortable with
i shouldnt have eaten anything, maybe i should have gone back to sleep instead
because now im feeling uncomfortable with having eaten and feeling fat

I don't think I'll be able to get out of the mentality of my current self. I think I actually do need help. And I don't believe I'll reach out for it, no matter how little it may be that I need. I can't see myself getting out of this. I feel sick, in that distressed sort of way.