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2022-04-12 14:21:01 (UTC)

Prompt 160: Pro Sports

160. Sports fans love their big city ability to visit a professional sports stadium as often as they like. Create a story in which you attend three major city sporting events in a single day. What do you eat and drink, who do you watch and what craziness do you experience in each separate venue? Do you think this city is the best in the world for the fans? Why or why not?

The town I'm leaving has pro sports teams for American football, baseball, and soccer/footy. The only of these I've ever attended - at least for the current teams, anyway - is baseball. Even then, the most-recent time I attended - which was over 10 years ago by now - was a complimentary ticket. I'll write about that experience here, because it was a blast.

I was helping to run a DIY/community theater at the time with several fellow alumni from our old university days. One of them was a teller for a local banking institution, and he had picked up a handful of tickets to a weekend-afternoon ball game. Free beer was available in the Bullpen prior to the start of the game and at the time I was a total lush, so it was a no-brainer I would attend.

There were four of us, and one agreed at the outset to be the designated driver. That gave the three of us remaining free license to do our part in reducing the available free beer. I dutifully drank, and drank, and drank. Maybe I had to visit the restroom perhaps once (to use one of those dreadful "piss-troughs" found at sports stadiums for drunks like me), but what I distinctly recall is that the game eventually started and they stopped serving.

So we ambled up to our seats in the nose-bleed section of the stands, waaaaay over there next to left field. The awnings prevented us from burning up in the sun. It almost sounds poetic. Somehow more beer became available (maybe from my well-off friend who worked for the bank?). Anyhow, it was likely third inning when the home team was being pounded, and being of sound mind and body, we all knew that it was up to us to take responsibility for our own entertainment.

"We're gonna do a wave!!!" one of us shouted. "Ready? READY?!?! One, two, THREE!!!"

And so the (first) wave went perfectly. It carried across the stadium at least twice before petering out. We felt imminently-responsible. It became our natural, sporting obligation to set it up for the next inning.

"We're gonna do a wave!!!" one of us shouted. Etc. etc.

Our idiotic trio became the locus of waves from that point forward. By the seventh-inning stretch, the outcome of the game was a foregone conclusion and we were slobberingly inebriated, as well as completely hoarse. Determined to persist out of our sense of duty, we hollered once again. This time with a twist:

"ONE MORE TIME!" The crowd around us knew exactly what we meant, and they cheered us on. Through the eighth inning the wave coursed round the upper decks at least twice before subsiding.

Middle of the ninth: "ONE MORE TIME!!!" Again.

Perhaps I had personally consumed an entire keg of Bud Light or whatever it was they were serving that day. I don't remember much about the day apart from how much I was yelling, and how much my vocal chords were shredded. The day after at work, I croaked apologetically to the rest of the tech support team that I wouldn't be able to answer the phones that day. Totally worth it.

I'm absolutely certain of two things: I've not attended a baseball game since, and were I to do so once again (even if I wasn't drinking), I'd do exactly the same thing. Being a loud idiot is just what people do at pro sports games, and when in Rome...

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