Gentleman ♀

Oh God

Hey,

So I haven't talked to Olivia yet but I'm practically shaking with anxiety. She texted me this morning and we agreed that we'd walk to coding together so we can talk then and once we get to coding we'll talk out in the pod if we're allowed to. I'm not gunna lie, this is kinda scary. Now, I get that we're only in 7th grade and they're technically not even teenagers yet, but I don't want to brush it off. Maybe it's not the most serious breakup they're ever going to go through but I still don't want to undermine their feelings. Plus, she agreed to tell Vinny that I know but she's "waiting for the right time to say it" and I don't really know how to react to that. I'd much rather she tell him now but I'm not going to pressure her. I just want to know as soon as Vinny knows so that I don't have to pretend and make it weird. I'd also like to talk to him about it even if it's just a few words on my part. It'll probably be awkward though because I don't really know how much it affected him. He's an emotional kid, it could be really upsetting to him or at least stressing him out. But then again, he's the one who broke it off and he didn't strike me as the relationship type anyway, plus he's a tween boy so maybe it literally couldn't matter less.

It's the beginning of coding class now and I've gotta say, maybe it's just me but Vinny seems happy today. We walked all the way from one class to another talking and making fun of each other while Olivia was mostly silent. Vinny told me that since I didn't cry at the drama club meeting that he was gunna make me cry with an onion or something since he's never seen me cry. I told him that there was no chance because I was emotionless (that's obviously a joke, I'm not some fake depressed gacha kid) and cold~. The walk wasn't awkward but you could tell something was up. Vinny and Olivia definitely had two very different vibes going on. I think Vinny's just happy to be friends again while Olivia's still thinking about how they're exes now. I think there are only two ways this could really go. Either Olivia keeps on thinking about how they're technically exes and they are somewhat forced to drift apart or she forgets it and they return to being best friends. Of course, it's not that simple but I think that's the easiest way to explain it. It's all so confusing *M* I don't know how serious to take it.

Coding is over now and she showed me the texts. Honestly, it's the most civil breakup I've ever seen between my friends. Although with Kiarras exes scream poetry thing and Avery in general the bar isn't too high. I don't have screenshots since she showed me irl but from what I can remember it was pretty much Olivia saying "you did great at the musical tonight then Vinny saying thanks but asking if they can be serious for a second. Olivia said yeah and Vinny warned her that he might type for a while. That's when he sent her the first quote from my last entry. They talked for a bit and Olivia asked if it was her fault. Vinny assured her that it wasn't but she wasn't convinced. She asked if they ever had a chance at being together again and he shot the idea down. This is around when he sent the second quote. The rest was just kind of them talking more about it but whatever was said wasn't important enough for me to remember. Olivia showed me old texts of them contemplating whether to tell me or not and said that she was sorry for not telling me. She said that she just couldn't make everyone happy so she decided that one was better than none. She kept saying that she was sorry but I assured her that it was alright. I told her that it wasn't exactly not my business but it wasn't my personal business either. I get it, if they didn't want to tell me then I have to respect that. It's their decision, not mine.

At the beginning of pride, we went out into the pod to do the weekly announcements and it was pretty normal... yet juuuuuust a bit off. Like how you'd feel in a simulation, you know? We sat in a line going Shannon (Olivias' friend), Olivia, Vinny, Me, Wyatt. Vinny was just a little too happy to be normal and Olivia was just a little too quiet to be normal. I probably wouldn't have even noticed it if I didn't know what went on. I'll admit it though, other than Olivia being quiet, I sort of like this new thing we have going on. It's only been a few hours but I like it so far. Vinny seems so much happier and that makes me happier. I think Olivia still wants to be with Vinny but what can you do? If Vinny stays like this and Olivia gets over their whole relationship enough to be normal again I think this could be a good thing. Don't get me wrong, I'm still sad that they broke up, I'd do anything to help either of them if they need it, and it still hurts that they hid it from me, but maybe in the long term it could help us all learn an important lesson or something. No matter what ends up happening, in the end, I just want what's best for both of my friends.

Also, quick note: Vinny promised that at the end of the year I can give him a full makeover. He specifically said sparkly purple eyeshadow and rainbow nails so if he tries to deny it just show him this entry. Vinny, if you're reading this (probably over text) you've been caught in the act! Didn't think I'd make note of it, did you? He also didn't refuse rainbow eyeshadow so Maybe I'll do that. He's gunna look so gorgeous >:D

I think I'll end this entry here but I'll probably post again today. Buh bye!

~ Gentleman