no name
Ad 2:
2022-03-11 01:03:07 (UTC)

Life no Vibe

Life is not a vibe this week.
-stomach does not deflate
-I keep eating more than I want to
-my parents and sister found out about that mutilation thing (πŸ’€πŸ’€)
-I’m behind in World History
-I lost my headphones
It feels like I have no control over myself. How depressing! I feel like my soul is being sucked out of me at the end of each day🀣when will it be over!? LOL

I was thinking and I came to the conclusion that I am a weak link!πŸ˜† Change is impossible and what is already bad cannot be fixed. Best not to stress over it, right? All that I can do is subtly add or subtract a few conditions from my unhealthy daily coping routineπŸ€” Like food! I bet I’d be better off without it. The sleepiness I feel right now makes me feel like I’m dying. Incredible! Uh, I could also try harder to make my after school nap short instead of allowing myself to sleep long. Other than that, I don’t think I could do anything without dying. Maybe stop feeling so spineless at school but hey! That’s not possible, not with the amount of intimidation I feel from everyone at school. πŸ˜‚ πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚
My brain feels like dissolving gum in hot water haha

So yeah😚 I’ll get work done later today for sure. Don’t feel like reading anymore, maybe my imagination will aid me in sleep. Get my homework done. Don’t eat as much.
Gosh I feel like turning inside out and combusting
-Clean glasses

At least tomorrow Friday. Once I finish all my work I can lie in bed and not get out until Sunday.
It’ll all be okay. Just a few more hours and it’s gonna be over. Just a few more hours. It’s gonna be fine. We’re gonna go to school and go home. That’s all. Just 7.5 hours. Don’t have to look at or talk to anyone, just get some work in. You may not feel fine there but I can promise you it’s just the effects of being inside that institution. Everything will be fine if you find those headphones and sleep. No pressure. Just little longer.
I wish I could turn inside out and do it in your stead but that’s not how-

I want to kill myself.