Slowly descending into madness
2021-12-03 23:39:37 (UTC)


It’s 5:39 am and I cannot seem to get any sleep. I'm slowly losing track of reality. For example: I don’t quite remember if the last time I wrote was today or yesterday..

I feel like hibernating. Logging out of all social medias and just concentrate on painting and writing and working.

I got a few projects to work on. But instead of working on them, I feel like working on myself. Everything is hurting me and it's getting out of control. Is this the winter blues? Or am I feeling this bad for certain reasons? I don’t know.

I have another diary here. It has a few entries from 2017. But in this one I'm more consistent. I love this about myself, that I could keep up writing. Usually after a few days I give up whatever the fuck I'm doing. This is new. This is exciting. This is a good practice.

Now I just have to work on concentrating. And getting rid of this depressive episodes.