Slowly descending into madness
2021-12-03 14:26:57 (UTC)
Hollow and death
December is back and I'm traumatised. I feel like 2019 December is repeating with my heart broken into pieces.
I was studying branding for the next exam. Now I'm kind of thinking. I should hibernate. Not talking to anyone for awhile. Heal myself. Stay alone.
Sometimes I wonder if I die or simply stop existing, would someone try to find me? I don’t think so. No one will find me. And I'll die again and again in the emptiness that I continuously feel inside myself when I'm not busy.
I don't know how to feel good and I don’t want to hurt anyone with my negative energy. A part of me does want to kill myself. After all, nothing will change if I'm gone and that's just the way of life.