Divorced, now what? #4
Just words (HISTORY)
I've been in the hospital for a few days, i had to stay longer due to some complications but both, my son and I, were doing great. My parents came to visit, which i allowed, after all, they are now new grandparents. Bass' mom also came to visit, very weary of the situation, but i still loved her dearly, she was/will always be my second mom. Every day i would ask if Bass called, maybe left a message, sending something, anything, i looked, longed for any sign that i was still important to him. If not, that maybe his son, would be important to him. Nothing. I asked Bass' mom if he knew that he had a son as I kept the gender a secret, as a surprise, she shook her head from side to side, she didn't want to tell him, she felt that it wasn't her place to tell. She was angry with him, the way he reacted, is now behaving. She told me that that wasn't the son she raised. I believed her, i still do to this day.
Going home and walking into my home, everything was just so new. Sam and Clive bought and brought me things that slipped my mind, baby stuff, house stuff like a rocking chair, but also plenty of cooked food for me to freeze and thaw out when needed. Sam told me that she would stay with me, to help me for the first few days till i find my feet. Clive would take care of their kids, after all they live just next door. I was just filled with gratitude, i still don't know what i would've done without them.
Almost two weeks in, i got the hang of it, mostly. What cry means what, but Jon was a quiet baby, only squeal when his diaper needed a change more than that he just made the normal baby groans.
Christmas eve i drove to Bass' parents house to give them their gifts and wish them a blessed Christmas. Evelyn (Eve), Bass' mom opened the door. She greeted me and her grandson warmly and invited me in for a cup of tea. We just talked the normal things, how things were going, if i settled in, if i needed any help, the normal conversation between mom and daughter. Bass' dad barged in, very ... surprised to see us. He put down his brief case and walked over to us. He asked if he can hold his grandson which, I was very hesitant. Bass' dad is a very nice man but he can flip in a matter of seconds. i never know on what ground you stand on with him. I looked over to Eve, and she gave me a crooked smile. I stood up and gave Jon to Bass' dad to hold. He sat down on the couch next to me, fondle with Jon.
He asked me if i needed anything, money, i kindly refuse his offer. I know, never to accept money from a lawyer, especially Collin.
He apologized for lying to me about Bass' whereabouts the morning of the birth. I kept quiet. He told me that Bass have been in a relationship with Eliana since my graduation from University. That he informed her that she was also, now pregnant. I. was. furious. I looked over to Evelyn, as to suggest if she knew but i could see in her reaction, that this was new news for her as well.
My heart was just shattered. Deep down i knew but i guess i just didn't want to believe it, the words were just the confirmation. It hurt. I remained quiet. Collin looked over at me, showing no emotion. "You know, if you're going to file for divorce, my firm will defend my son and file for full custody of our grandson." Evelyn stood up, furiously, took Jon from Collin, took my hand and walked me outside. At that stage, i some how switched to autopilot. I felt nothing. Not angry. Not afraid. Not happy. Nothing. Divorce?
I will be one of the statistics. Divorced. Evelyn mumbled a few words, that i later recollected that she didn't want us to be at the house as she wanted to talk to Collin, that i shouldn't worry, that she will sort it out. I shouldn't make any haste decisions, to take some time.
Divorce never cross my mind. Even when Collin told me that Bass got another girl pregnant. Yeah i was angry, and yeah we did marry in court but i made a promise, a vow, and those i keep dear to my heart, because what are promises if not kept, just words meaning nothing, no trust, that is just what they are then, just words.