no name
2021-11-21 14:14:04 (UTC)

Fudging disgusting.

I hate humans. I hate being human. I wouldn’t want to be an animal either. Being human makes me feel like an animal, so of course I’d hate it. I hate being so fleshy and affected by disease. I hate talk of virus’, bacteria, illness, and the effects of it. It’s all disgusting and scary. I could never be a doctor. I hate vomit or the act of it, it might even be a phobia since my brother threw up in the car one time and I just stopped existing. Minor case of germaphobia or something. I can’t even deal with someone breathing in my personal space bubble. Took me a while to even be okay with people touching me, even now I don’t like peoples hand being on me or my stuff. It’s not like I’m afraid of getting sick, well that’s a part of it, but I don’t want anyones germs at all. I have my own and I want to keep it that way. I hate this world. This disgusting, sick, infected, absolutely contaminated, unsafe world. And I wish I could curl up in my blanket and read the rest of my existence away instead of having to deal with the other humans that exist outside of myself.

I wish I were simply a spirit, a soul, not something that be touched. Not something that could absorb or be affected by external things. Not something that had a real form to hate. Not something to be ignored or focused on. To be liked or disliked. I hate sickness.